The secret of the rose

Part 3 Chapter 14

                                                                    Steven

My night is restless. My dreams are dotted with gardens, shooting stars and Jenny's laughter. Through all these beautiful images that pass in my head are confused by those of my past that I want to forget. I wake up sweaty and my sheets are tangled and wet. I take a long shower to erase these depressing images. By letting the water run down my back, I close my eyes and imagine myself in Jenny's arms. My body responds viscerally. I turn the tap to cold water to pull myself together. After finding my way of thinking, I get out and finish getting ready to go to work.

When I get out the apartment, I see that Jenny has already left. I am disappointed, I wanted to take the time to apologize for my temerity last night. As I approach my bike, I see a paper hanging on my dashboard that floats in the winds, probably another pamphlet. To my astonishment, it is a note folded in half. Taking the pale pink paper, I start to look around me. Intrigued, but excited to think that this note could come from Jenny. I read it word by word, twice rather than one, aloud.

- Hi, Steven, I had a wonderful evening yesterday. I am very happy to know you more. I thank you for these beautiful moments. See you again soon. Signed Jenny.

My heart wants to explode. My whole body vibrates with happiness. Realizing she had not waited for me when I returned from my call, I thought she was offended by my daring actions, but on the contrary, she seems to have liked it. I read the last sentence a second time by memorizing each word. She specifically pointed out that she wanted to see me again. Having fallen under her spell the second I met her, I always hoped that one day this feeling was mutual.

I cannot delay longer; I must go to work. But the desire to go find her on campus challenges me. I change my mind despite the temptation. I would be too adventurous for her, which would simply drive her away. I must be patient. She is so fragile. I do not want to lose her now that our feelings are shared. I have the feeling that this day will be very long. I let out a sigh of disappointment and get on my bike to get to work.

I am distracted all day. My boss must call me repeatedly. I let the engine oil overflow, mislead myself when changing tires and accidentally break the work lamp. Being a model employee, my boss does not understand anything anymore. I put my mistakes on the cause of fatigue. If he knew what is going on in my head, I am not sure he would be so compassionate. Since there is no more client's in the garage, my boss let me leave early for the rest of the day. I did not ask for it, but I accept with gratitude. This pause is well-timed. I will take this opportunity to find the chosen of my heart.

For her part, Jenny is also distracted during her classes. The teachers' words are like an endless serenade. She takes notes but ends up writing Steven's name everywhere in her notebook. The image of his lips almost on her own, plays in loop in her head. Her concentration is certainly not at the rendezvous. Instead of going to the library as she does every day, she decides to go back to her apartment.

Everything is new to her, but scary at the same time. Steven is still a mystery for Jenny. She has come to know him over time and specially to trust him. With his charismatic charm, he has slowly conquered her heart. In front of him, she loses control and contact with reality. What she has not been allowed to do since the death of her parents. Jenny never felt so lost. What should she do? How should she react? She is a novice regarding love, which destabilizes her as never before. The unknown makes her fearful but is exciting at the same time. To let herself live the present moment has always been inaccessible to her. But Steven gives her such a sense of security that it is a vital need.

Jenny knows Steven's routine. The infernal noise of his motorcycle approaching slowly under her bedroom window is heard at the same time every night for months. It is still too early when she arrives at her home. Despite the excitement of seeing him again, she is relieved to see that his bike is not parked in its location. Her nervousness is boiling. To calm down, she decides to study on the wooden swing garden chair, now her favorite place.