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Chapter 6

Moonbyul

Throughout the ride all I have in mind is Kim Yongsun. Her face, her scent, her body; I may be sound like a perverted guy but I'm just honest with my thoughts. I don't know but I'm literally crazy about her existence, and for God sake she's just beside me.

As we enter the restaurant, Yong hurriedly walk towards our favorite spot which is the one who is not so crowded. We already eat here a couple of times so the owner know us as her VIP customers. I gave the manager a knowing smile and she already know what it meant. She nod and gave the instructions to the crews.

"We'll order as the usual?" She asked and fix herself comfortably in the chair.

"I already ordered us the usual." I answered as I sat infront of her.

I always sit beside her when we plan to eat outside but not this time. It'll hurt my feelings more knowing we are not in the same page. She notice the proximity of our body but she just ignore it.

"You did? Did you reserve a reservation?" She asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"No? Uhm Sort of? I mean, the manager already know us so I just gave her a smile and she know it already."

I thought she's just dense towards me. I didnt know she's also dense towards her surroundings.

"A smile? Are you flirting with the manager here Moonbyulyi?"

What?

I look at her in disbelief as a soft laughed escaped my mouth. Is she serious right now? Me flirting with the manager? Nah ah. My world only revolves around her. 

"What? Of course not! What I mean is we eat here as always so she know us and our orders. A smile is enough for her to know that we'll take our usual orders, and it's obvious because we just enter the restaurant." I explained.

She look at me not knowing if I'm telling her the truth or what. Her reaction makes me want to pinch her bloated cheeks and kiss her until she surrender.

Ugh why can't we just be together???

"Oh okay.... but why are you so defensive?"

"Are you kidding m-"

"Here's the usual ma'am."

I cut off my answer as the manager took our attention and the crew who's tailing behind her put the different sets of meat, vegetable wraps and the other side dishes. I saw yongsun raised her eyebrows but I just shrugged it off as I gave the crews a sheepish smile and mouthed thank you as they walked away.

I heard her scoffed before she took the meat and place it in the pan. All throughout her cooking session my eyes never leave her scrunch face. She's cute when she's jealous; I know she's not jealous but daydreaming is not bad.

For the past few days I've been working with the song I made for her. Yes, the song is all about her, it's about what I feel for her. But the song doesn't consists a happy ending story, nor a story where we end up with each other, it's not also tragic. The song is like, I don't know, the song is about our moments together. How happy I become when she's on my side. How lucky I am to have her but, I know not all times.

And if your asking why I decided to meet her now and act like nothing happened even she already rejected me. Well I'm not that immature. I won't let my feelings ruined our relationship and mamamoo's. I may be idiot but I know what's the best to do for everyone, even if that includes hurting myself in the process.

"Eat." She said but I know it's a command. She's still not in the mood and the coldness in her voice proves me right.

"Are you mad?" I said, praying she's not. I know she's hot when she's mad but I don't want her to act strangely to me now.

"No. Why would I be?" She said and crossed her arms.

Okay. She might be mad.

"But why are you giving me a cold response?"

"Who told you-"

"I love you"

Three little words, enough for her to shut her mouth.

"If you're jealous about the smile I gave to the manager don't worry about it. Even If I smile a hundred times to all of them it's still no use. They may have my smile but they will never have my heart. You are the reason why it's beating and that will never change. I belong to you yong, and it's okay If you don't belong to me." I said.

Yongsun's face can't be described right now. She opened her mouth wanting to say something but choose to close it, open, close it again. Her face is red like a tomato and the other meat she's cooking are starting to get burned.

"I- I'm sorry if I can't reciprocate the love you have for me." Oh wow. It hurts like hell.

"You're special to me byulah. I-I mean, you are my bestfriend and I'm thankful for all the good deeds you have did for me. You always take care of me and all but... I just see you as my little sister." She explained and I didn't know the pain inside me is still not in it's higher level. Now it is.

"It's o-okay, really. I won't force myself to anyone, just love me as your bestfriend and I'm good."

Be natural Moonbyul. You are a one tough person. You can't cry infront of her. I convince myself.

"But I'm hurting you." Yes you are and you already did.

"This is just for a meantime. It will fade as the time goes by. Don't worry." Lie.

We've been together for almost 7 years and it didn't fade moonbyulyi, it just made it worst! My mind stated.

"I know but-"

She didn't finished her sentence when we heard her phone rang and even if it's not place close to me, I still saw the caller ID.

Eric Nam.

"Answer it, I might hit the restroom a bit. I'm about to pee here." I said jokingly whining and stomped my feet underneath the table. She gave me an apologetic smile as she nod.

I stood up and walk towards the restroom. I don't know why I stop at my tracks and look at her again. I know I might regret looking back but I still want to see her happy with with someone. And there it goes, I saw her smiling widely while talking to the man in the other line.

By that time I concluded, I'm not the one who can make yongsun happy.
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I've been staring my reflection for the past few minutes and I guess I'm not planning going back to where yongsun is. I'm not in the mood to go out and face her again, but I have to. I just needed more time and courage to sit infront of her not tearing up with all the emotions building up inside me now.

With one last glance I fix myself ready to go out when I bump into someone and spilled the coffee she's holding to her shirt.

Wow. This is the worst day ever!
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