Where Is God? - Sabriel

xi

I really am working on kissing him. Unfortunately, it's been difficult to find an appropriate situation again. We're stuck in school together most the time, and though I've upped my flirting game (he has too and damn, is he smooth), school does not seem like the most romantic setting to kiss him for the first time.

I guess I was trying a little too hard one afternoon, getting carried away yet again, and I lost track of time.

"Fuck!" I blurt out when I notice the time, scrambling to pack my stuff away. "I'm going to be late to pick up the kids."

Sam frowns worriedly. "Oh god, I'm sorry I kept you."

I grin quickly, despite my panic. "You should be sorry. Your pretty face distracted me far too much."

Sam smirks at me. "Do you ever stop flirting?"

"I'll stop if you stop being so damn gorgeous," I say, resting my hand hand on his cheek for a second. "Farewell, fair Maden. Til we meet again."

He seems surprised by my sudden physical contact, cheeks flushing. "Bye, Gabe. Good luck getting there in time."

"Thanks. See ya!"

I run off, first jogging, then sprinting, checking my watch every 30 seconds like a maniac. Fuck fuck fuck fuck, gonna be late.

I am late, and by the time I get there it feels like my lungs are bleeding. I pant heavily, resting my hand on my chest as I try to get my breath back. I'm outside the door of their classroom, only a small handful of parents left. Anna's teacher smiles at me when I get there.

"Someone's already collected your two, Gabriel," she informs me.

My blood runs cold, fear grabbing hold of my heart and shaking me so fiercely it's as though my bones have shattered.

"Wh-What?" I stammer out, voice high and intense. Who the bloody hell took them and where are my siblings?

She smiles reassuringly. "Your brother, I believe?"

"No, Castiel is-" I stop, whacked in the face with a realisation that makes me so relieved I almost collapse, air filling my lungs again. "Lucifer?"

She nods in agreement. "Lucifer. Yes. He took them."

"Oh, that-" I cut myself off before I can finish my sentence. Bastard. That fucking bastard gave me a motherfucking heart attack. "Thank you. Thanks. Uh, bye."

I start to walk away, slowly, in a daze, my lungs not properly recovered. Lucifer's back. I don't know how to feel. Some warning would have been nice, I suppose, before I had an almost melt down, having convinced myself that they'd been kidnapped and I'd never see them again and it would have been my fault because I couldn't stop bloody flirting with Sam. Fool. You absolute fool.

I take my time walking home, mostly because my legs hurt from running all the way here, also because I need some time to process and consider what I'm going to say to Lucifer. Let me run you through some options.

Hey! Long time, no see! Good to see you. Where have you been?

How the fuck could you turn up after months like nothing's happened? You left me here to look after them alone, you asshole!

Thanks for picking the kids up! How long will you be staying?

Still dealing drugs for a living? Hey, I'm not judging. It's a noble profession.

I'm furious. And relieved. And fucking furious. But so fucking relieved. If he sticks around, I can unladen myself with responsibility and hand it to him, the older brother who doesn't have school to worry about. The older brother who has no other responsibility because he's not burdened with a real job.