My Beginning, End & Ever After

5. Iski biwi pakka isko joote maarti hogi

(Sidharth's POV)

I saw the whole interaction between Siya and the girl. I found Siya very cute. The other girl too responded lovingly. I guess, she loves kids. So do I! After kissing her cheeks, Siya ran away. I kept looking at the little girl. At first, I didn't notice that the other girl was still there. When I finally looked at her, she came to me and introduced herself as Shehnaaz.

I liked the name. But I didn't realize when I said, "That's a cool name." These words just came out of my mouth. Although I meant it, but I never complimented anyone, especially in the first meeting. It was so unlike me. 

But honestly, she was a very pretty girl. She had a positive charisma and I loved the way she smiled while talking.

I introduced myself to her. Shehnaaz asked me if I had joined the dance class? And then without waiting for my reply she started telling me about her love for dance. I didn't know why, but I listened patiently. 

When she stopped, I told that I am so unlike her. I don't enjoy dancing at all. What attracted me the most was she seemed so bright and cheerful while speaking to a complete stranger.

Her expressions changed when I told her that I came for anger management class. I hope she doesn't judge me. 

But then I saw we were still holding hands! Ye toh record ban gaya. Itni der toh maine aaj tak kisi ladki ka haath nahi pakda. 

Feeling awkward, I left the place.

It was my first interaction with Shehnaaz but it felt like I knew her from Adam. She seemed so friendly. Pata nahi log itni jaldi friends kaise bana lete hai. Mera toh haal hi alag hai. Dosti toh door ki baat, mujhe toh baat karne ke liye topic hi nahi milte. I shrugged off these thoughts, and moved to my destination. Hai kaha ye class? Iss class ko dhundne se zyada easy toh Ananya Pandey ke career me struggle dhundna hai.

I followed the directions given by that lady. WOOHOO! Finally mil gayi ye jagah. Yaha tak ka safar hi itna mushkil tha, pata nahi aage kya hoga.

I entered the room. A man in his mid-30s came towards me and said, "You must be Sidharth Shukla. I am Anand Gupta, your instructor. Please come behind me." He started moving inside. We moved across 3 rooms to get in the room assigned for me. Lagta hai yaha rooms ki inception chal rahi hai.

On entering the room, I had a look around. Room dekhkar samjh nahi aa raha tha ki walls hai ya scrapbook? Itni pictures toh maine kabhi apne projects me nahi chipkai jitni inki walls pe lagi hai.

'Listen to music', 

'Count to 10',

 'Think of your best memory',

 'Breathe' all this was written on it. Bro are you serious? Breathe?! Kon gadha hai jo gusse me saans lena bhul jaata hai. In the corner of the room, I saw a punching bag. Ye punching bag mera peecha hi nahi chhodta. Jaha jaata hu waha aa jaata hai. Kya karu mein, mar jau?

Anand sir sat on his chair and asked me to sit opposite to him, across the table. I went there and made myself comfortable.

"So, Sidharth. Welcome to V&J. Let's have a quick view on why you are here. Your problem is anger, right?" He asked a really bizarre question. Nahi, aankhen band karta hu toh kaala kaala dikhta hai isliye aaya hu tere paas. Kya ajeeb aadmi hai ye! Anger management me koi insaan kho kho khelne thodi aayega.

"I have guessed by your expressions, that you are cursing me in your mind. The feeling you are having right now is the least of your anger. If I keep asking you such questions, this level will keep on rising."

"So tell me, what exactly do you feel when things go wrong, or not in the way you expected them to?" He asked me.

"Okay sir, let me get this straight out. Like every other person, I have feelings too. But unlike others, I don't like to express everything I feel. For example, if I get really happy, I don't immediately show it on my face. When I feel sad, I don't cry. And its not because of the 'Boys don't cry' mentality, but I just cannot. Even when I want to, tears don't make their way. But when it comes to anger, its like a volcano of emotions which erupts through me, and all the feelings come out in that way."

"Basically, your reflex to every situation is anger?" I shrugged, not really knowing what to say. "Sidharth, can you tell me what thoughts come to your mind when you feel your temper rising?"

"When I get angry, everything in the world starts to feel negative to me. Be it anything or anyone, if it comes my way when I'm out of my mind, I feel like throwing it away."

"Let's have a little test of your anger. Go to the punching bag." I did as he said. Paise diye hai toh baat bhi maan hi leta hu.

"Now think of something which annoys you the most and punch the bag." I closed my eyes and the first thing that came to my mind was Shivam. Ugh, that irritating face. I punched the bag. And I tell you what? I punched it really hard as if it was Shivam who was standing there. Anand sir just looked at it and shook his head. Then silently, he noted something in his notebook. Abe kuch toh bol, idhar kya tujhe khali dekhne ke paise diye hai maine.

"Now think of something you like the most and then punch again."

I closed my eyes, and you wouldn't believe what came in my brain. SHEHNAAZ's face came in front of my eyes! I couldn't understand what happened but it gave a soothing vibe to my mind. The girl I just met minutes ago was calming me. Damn, that girl is really something. 

I opened my eyes and punched the bag. It was so soft as if I just touched it. Anand sir signaled me to come back. But still, Shehnaaz's face kept on striking my thoughts.

"See, I won't ask you ki tumne kya sochkar punch kiya. Keep it to yourself. But I did this to make you realize what annoys you extremely and what soothes your mind." He kept on speaking for almost 1 hour. 

I tried to pay attention to him but my mind was still thinking, why did Shehnaaz's face calm me? Maybe because it was a beautiful experience meeting her. Kuch toh gadbad hai daya pata lagao. Hoga kuch reason, chhodo. 

Anand sir gave me a ABCDE method to calm myself. Ab poora describe karunga toh bore ho jaoge, itna samajh lo ye karne se gussa control ho jaata hai, 'dusro ka'. Mera pata nahi, ye bol raha hai isliye maan leta hun. Par ye toh chup hi nahi ho raha, kitna bolega bhai? Iski biwi pakka isko joote maarti hogi.

It was 5:20 but he was still speaking endlessly. He was trying to help me, but I felt like he was riling me up. 

Ye mujhe wo pandit lag raha tha jiske mantra shadi me koi sunta nahi hai par phir bhi bolna hai. 

"So Sidharth, we will have sessions everyday until next saturday aur phir tumhari progress dekhkar decide karenge ki tumhe weekly class chahiye ya yahi continue rakhe. I hope it helps. And remember why you are here. You need to control your temper. I was quite evident from your face that you wanted to punch me." He said. I did not even try to smile. Bhagg, aaya bada.  

I shook hands with him and left the room. I hoped to see Shehnaaz on the way. When I didn't see her, I peeped in the dance room. But there was no sign of her. Bad luck!

I left from there and went home. I entered my place and the servants informed me that mom and dad went for a meeting. Kabhi apni bete ki bhi sun lo, hamesha bas kaam me hi lage rehte hai.

I went to my room and packed my bag for the next day. I was heading towards a new adventure. I changed into night shorts and laid on the bed and within minutes, I dozed off.

(End of POV)

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Kyo aa raha hai Sidharth ko baar baar Shehnaaz ka khayal? Jaanne ke liye jude rahiye.

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Till then, adios amigo!