I'm more than just the second wife

12

Yanda has driven back to Pretoria after what his father said. He didn't bother telling anyone. I was once again left high and dry. What was I to do? Do I go back to Ntabenhle and go on with what's left of my life or do I blindly follow a man who clearly wants nothing to do with me into a city that I'm unfamiliar with because even though I've visited my friends there but I'd never had to navigate my own way there. I wasn't given the choice to decide. My father in law made the necessary arrangements for me to go to Pretoria. He arranged the moving vans.

I sat in the empty kitchen with the last of the boxes wrapping up Zanda's cup. It had Elsa on it and a glitter compartment that moved up and down as you moved it. My heart aches for her at every moment of the day but my ache worsens with the sight of something that reminds me of her.

"Zonke, you're leaving me?" Sim whispered as her voice broke midway. I hadn't seen her standing at the entrance of the kitchen. Last I remember she was directing some of the men on where and how she wanted the furniture to sit around the house, I'd given her all the furniture. She was beyond happy and has been thanking me endlessly for days now. Before we knew it we were both crying in each other's arms. "I don't want to, this is my home now. My whole life is here. They're taking everything from me. My child, freedom and every semblance of normalcy I try to create for myself." I said through the sobs.

After half an hour of standing like that Sim pulled out of my embrace and wiped my tears. "This place was limiting you. You've done amazing things for us but think of this as exploring your horizons. I'll see to it that your work is not in vain. It'll only grow from now on." She said through her own tears trying hard to smile through the pain.

One of the men came in and took the boxes. "Come let's explore the house for the last time." Sim said pulling my hand and waddling to the living room. "All this is you. You found this house in ruins and you restored it, you did the same for our village. You're a nurturer, you bring light with you wherever you go. As much as I want you to stay here I don't want to deprive all those you'll meet of your light." I felt my throat constrict at her words and tears sting my eyes. "Thank you Sim. When the young one comes I want to be the first to know." I said and the mood lifted.

We carried on our tour in silence. I wanted her to have the house but I didn't want to say anything until I got the papers to say so. It's going to be hard to get it in her name because a woman can't own anything in this god forsaken backward village but I aware it it will be hers. No man has ever stopped me before they won't start now. Our last stop was in Zanda's room. Onami was seated on the floor playing with the toys he asked to keep from Zanda's stash. He really missed her. I caught him wandering aimlessly in their favorite spots over the last two days.

"Come baby pack your stuff and let's go. Anti needs to go now." He packed his toys without argument or bargaining with his mom, which was so unlike him. We all walked out and they walked me to my car. It felt so empty without Zanda's car seat and her singing along to the track list of whatever Disney movie. "Come give me a hug my love." Onami came to me, I picked him up and he nuzzled his head in my neck. "I'll miss you and Zanda. Please tell her I say hi and that she must come visit me." He said softly before he wiggles off me and he went and stood in between his mom  and dad. He'd been helping the movers even though I'd told him countless times he doesn't need to.

I got into the car and drove behind the moving vans. I caught sight of Onami running towards me waving. I stuck my hand out and waved back until I couldn't see him.

When we got to the freeway one of the vans took a turn on the off ramp. It was delivering Zanda's stuff. We drove for a long 8 hours to the city of Pretoria. I was beyond exhaustion. When we finally arrived at the estate I had to call Nothile to give me Yanda's number so he could tell the securities to open for us. Married for 5 years and I don't even have his cell number. That's a joke if I've ever heard one.

The phone rang for what seemed like a millennia before he picked up. "Hello?" He rasped "Sawubona it's me Zonke. I'm at the gate please open." I said and then there was silence then shuffling them the call was cut. How was I going to survive living in the same house as this man and his rude wife. It hasn't even been half a day in this city but I already missed my sanctuary, my people and the assurance that they loved and accepted me into their space and home. I had half the mind to turn around and drive back home fatigue be damned.

I didn't get the chance to let the thought fester much longer as the boom gate opened letting us in. I drove in and told to drive to Louraine 43 after my thumbprints were loaded onto the biometric system. I'm guessing he asked them to do that.

I drove into the house to find they were off loading the boxes into the garage. It looked spacious. The whole house was enormous and it looked well groomed, from what I could see with help of the lights lighting up the pathways. No doubt an exterior decorator was employed. I'd admire the beautiful architecture some more after I'd gotten some sleep. It was past 22:00. I got out of the car and took out the small suitcase from the boot and hesitantly walked up to the front door.

It felt like more than just walking up to a front door. It symbolized opening a new chapter of my life that I wasn't sure I even wanted open to begin with. I raised my hand to knock when I noticed the doorbell. I rang it and thankfully he didn't take forever to answer it. Oh how I wished he had so I'd have just a bit more time to assemble my emotions or at least make sense of them. "Hello Ntombizonke please come in." He said in the calmest of voices it made it hard to read how he actually felt about my presence here but who am I kidding I knew exactly how he felt. The same way he felt 5 years ago.

I was interrupted from my internal rant by him leading me somewhere. "This is the kitchen, come I'll show you to your room." All I did was nod in response and we silently made our way up the stairs and into a very spacious room that was hardly furnished. The whole house seemed to lack furniture. I wonder why. "This is your room. The bathroom is behind that door. Goodnight." He rasped once more before he disappeared out the door and closed it behind him. I didn't let my mind dwell on any further thought. I got out of my clothes and grabbed my toiletry bag and headed to the bathroom to take a well deserved bath.

After an hour in there of which I'm sure I resembled a prune I felt fresh but all the more fatigued. I didn't bother with pajamas I just tossed myself on the bed and fell off to sleep.