I used to think
that habit would get old
and in a way I was correct
it grew old but didn't grow cold
so you can sit there
not sure of what you declare
I just know that you're angry
at your life because it's not fair
you take it out on me
but tomorrow comes to haunt you
mental bruises reminding
me that alcohol still pawns you
it's all in the past
but it's not for certain
I know tomorrow comes to pass
with your drink behind the curtain
no need to ask
cuz I'm not coming home
set my self up with tasks
and stay busy on the phone
to be honest
you scare me
I can't trust your antics
and I can barely harness
how mom thinks your romantic
your eyes askew
and speech all loose
you used to be my dad
but now I'm not sure who
I'll keep my lights off
as a pretense like I always have
I've built a strong defense
because those drinks get you mad
I'd like to say it's not your fault
we could blame it on the bad breaks
put everything as false
save ourselves from our own chase
you don't let that happen
it's too late, out of breath
now the audience is clapping
so grab another one instead
if further down the line
you could see where we'd end this
perhaps you'd grow spine
and start to be apprehensive
but you won't and I know
it's all helped me grow
so leave me alone
before I start to implode
you make me really ponder
how much longer 'til you disappear
the stories that you conjure
or the reasons to fear
about that now
well let's get it out
I'm sick of living without you
sick of living in a shroud
I'll be aware of my surroundings
when your acts start compounding
'til then I'll be doubting
'til then you'll keep shouting
No I never met your fist
But those words never miss
And it always consists
On how I fail to persist
But if anything sticks
Well let it be this
I used to love you
the man who taught me how to fish
keep a list of things
and make sure I finish
fuck those days
because I know they're gone
it's hard to fix a vase
when the pieces fit wrong
I've been, around you
I've seen, it all
and all that I've found is you relying on that flaw
I try to show you what I'm into
you have no interest
and at first I was hindered
just wanted you impressed
soon came to realize
there's no point in throwing stones
you have the bottle as an ally
that can rub away the sorrows
it's not my fault
that you don't like your job
you took it on the fall
instead chasing what you want
maybe I'm complaining
but I just want to fix it
if somehow I can help
you overcome the drink I wouldn't miss it
it would mean a lot for me
to see you control your drinking
I know it's a lot to ask, dad
but thanks for listening
