The Broken

IX.

"Jesus Az, don't do that!!"

I squeal, his nickname unconsciously slipping, his eyes softening as he hears it. I clear my throat and look down at my feet as silence embraces us, awkwardness not far behind.

"You can fight." He states more than asks with hidden amazement.

I nod. My hair falling around me like a curtain. The silence thickens, almost chocking. To fill it I blurt out the first thing that came to mind.

"I'm sorry! Please forgive me for saying I hated you, I don't hate you, I mean maybe a little for what you did, but you can't just expect me to-!" I stop rambling, my mouth dry, mortified.

I snap my head down trying to hide the resentment that flushes my cheeks.

"Lillian" He whispers, my name not as uncomfortable as it had been when he was first sounding out the syllables.

I don't look up.

"Lillian." he repeats, the deep timbers of his voice seem warmer, softer, as he tilts my head up. His eyes glowing with an emotion I'm not ready to understand.

"There is nothing to forgive."

My shoulders sag with relief. But I quickly compose myself and take a step back.

"Why are you here Azrael" As the cold wall bights into my back, almost supporting.

He stops approaching me and reads the other unasked question in my eyes.

"I came here to help Ragnar. We will be gone in a few days" His eyes have shut down now. His posture stiff.

The disappointment that hits me as I process his answer shocks me. I push it down angrily. He will be gone in a few days I say to myself with relief.

He will be gone in a few days.....

That relief starts turning bitter.

He will be gone in a few days....

Before I understand what I'm doing I warp my arms around his waist and hug him.

The realisation that he will be gone before he really entered my life crashes into me, and suddenly what he did in the past doesn't matter, because he is here now, and whatever his reasons where for doing that to me seem uninteresting.

His body tenses under my hold before he relaxes and wraps his arms around me tightly.

The feeling alone causes tears to spill down my cheeks and onto his shirt as his scent, his being surrounds me.

He holds me for a while as I cry in happiness, in sadness, relief. Whispering soothing words that fill my stomach with fluttering faeries. When my tears go from running to walking he finally releases me and what I see nearly brings me to my knees.

His eyes hold tears, his eyes that have never showed an ounce of his thoughts or emotions now show pools, rivers of them, just for me.

We stand there, holding each other, communicating without words.

A throat clears behind us, I turn around quickly and find Osoe tensely standing there with an unreadable expression on his face, his muscles locked.

"Lillian, Sam needs you in the kitchen."

"Of course!" I jump back into action, turning towards Az and gifting him a smile holding as much emotion as I dared show then jogging up to my room, lighter than I have ever felt.