I Love You, I'm Sorry

Worst Day

Astoria was sent to a hospital due to her sickness, her condition is getting much worse. It all started when she started fainting for a few days straight, at first she told us she's just tired and didn't have the time to eat, but we all know it was a lie.

 I don't know how am i going to handle this situation, i had to be strong for Scorpious, who kept crying hysterically ever since she was admitted to St Mungos. I tried my best to comfort the Mini Malfoy. I tried to bring him some of his favorite food because he doesn't have much time to eat, he just stayed there beside her mother, never wanting to leave her side.  but apparently, none of that mattered, all he wants is for his mom to recover as soon as possible and we could live our life again as a family. 

The healers at St Mungos are trying their best i believe, i never doubt their work ethic for once, they also always keep giving me updates regarding Astoria's conditions, giving information as detailed as possible so that i can understand the actions i need to take for her care. I desperately want her to heal, i can't face everything without her, she's always been my rock since the day i laid eyes on her. When everybody hates me and looks at me with full of disgusts, she is the only person who thinks the exact opposite. I haven't got a chance to have an actual friend until her. Well, I have Blaise, Crabbe and Pancy but since they've been busy with what they're doing, im all alone ever since.

I don't know how to cheer my son up. He just stayed there holding his Mom's hand on the other side of the bed. He's asleep.It's been like that after she was sent to the St Mungos. I took a week off from the Ministry to take care of her and our son. I tried to be optimistic for Scorpious, but the healers warned me to be ready if anything happened since she's getting paler and weaker, the healers already warned me that the last few days, her situation keeps getting worse.

Astoria warned me after I proposed that she was having a sickness, she thinks I deserve to live with a woman who can accompany me for a long long time. But at that time I didn't care at all because she was the only person who supported me throughout everything. It's like I found my guardian angel after all this time, i don't want to lose anyone again. But deep down on my heart, I knew that my marriage wasn't going to be long, we tried to seek for help from everyone, i dont care if i had to travel to the end of the world to find the cure or how much money that i had to spend, all i care about was health.  I really wished this marriage will be my first and my lasts. Sadly,  none of it worked. The blood borne curse that she had will make her age doesn't last very long. I cannot blame her because it's a family curse, Daphne her sister however had it too and died 2 years ago. That's why she warned me, because she knew deep down that she will ended up like Daphne and she doesn't want me to experience the loss because of her death. 

I can't believe it, i knew this day would come, our marriage is like a countdown ever since we exchanged vows even though i knew at the end everybody is going to die, but this is already predicted. The healers had already given up, not because of they gave up, but because the sickness had already spread to her body and none of the medications worked, it'll just hurt her even more. We just had to wait, She's no longer conscious, i found her passed out on our living room, i went to the hospital as soon as possible.

I went to the cafeteria to get Scorpius and I some food but as soon as the elevator opened, i saw a lot of doctors and healers rushing to get things from a room. It's not her room, right? It must be another patient's emergency. No, it's not her room. My heart was beating so loud but i tried to keep calm, begging to god and trying to convince myself that it's not from her room. But as soon as i was near her room, i heard a familiar scream, my son's.

 I hurried my step and  i finally arrived at her room her room, suddenly everything that i carried fell down to the floor, i couldn't believe my eyes. I can see for the first time Scorpius was hysterically crying, screaming his lungs out on her mother's lifeless body. He kept roaring non-stop, grabbing both of her mom's shoulders, shaking her for waking up.

"M-mother? W-what happened? M-mother??" i thought she was just collapsed or something, but the thin line on the monitor explains it all, she's gone. 

"Mother!! No! Mother wake up! This isn't funny anymore!" She kept shaking her until one of the healers had to step in.

"Sir, i need you to step aside please"  

"Out of my way you fool!!" for the first time, the low toned voice Scorpious who always answers nothing but yes screams and acts like that to other people.

"Sir we're just trying to do the procedure" I immediately grabbed him in order for the healers to start with the procedure. 

"Be strong okay?" asked him. a lot of healers were coming in to re-check her condition, doing everything they can to bring back her heart beat with all the technologies and magic potions that they had, I kept begging to god to at least give a miracle, i can't loose her. 

It was until one of the healers shook her head slowly, that came to my darkest nightmare,  Astoria is no longer here, she left us.

"Time of death, 4.40 pm" one of the healers said.

"No you bastard! My mother's still alive!" 

He almost punched the healers for not being able to save his mom.

"No, Scorpious stop!" i hugged him from the back trying to prevent chaos inside the room. I hugged him even tighter, trying my best to calm him down,  He tried to fight back but i was stronger because im still bigger than him.

"NOO NOOOO, MOTHER PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME" he begged. It tortures me a lot, i can only gave him a strong hug. It's upsetting that you can't do anything.

"FATHER, DO SOMETHING!" He yelled, that is when i cant control my tears on while hugging him from the back.

"I'm sorry, i'm sorry son" i brushed his hair trying to calm him down, but it didn't work, he just cried harder.

She died in peace, for once i swear i can see her smiling. I don't know how am i going to deal with this, but for sure. It's been the best 15 years of marriage of my life. You're no longer sick love, wait for me will you? I love you. I kissed her lips for the last time.