Total eclipse of a heart (Embry Call)

21. Gone

Embry remained in his spot, paralyzed by his grief as his imprint walked away without so much as a glance over her shoulder. He didn't move, he didn't breathe, simply stared at her disappearing figure and the gun that was still pointed at her head. Swallowing thickly, he was forced to break out of the reigns she had put on him by asking him to do nothing at all. She wanted him to forget her, but how could he ever? She was the best part of the future he'd seen for them, so how could he just let it all go?

For some reason, despite the pain distance caused them, Embry had done as she wished. Maybe it's because of the imprint bond that he'd listened to her and stayed away, or perhaps he was so deeply wounded by how quickly she left him without even putting up a fight, but he had tried to move on.

Going to school, picking up extra patrols, being with his pack...it numbed the pain, but the problem with numbing the pain is that you don't deal with it at all. When you don't let your heart feel what it needs so desperately, the numbness takes over entirely and you're stuck going through the motions - a pattern of behavior when even the slightest change could push the person over the edge and since Embry wasn't a regular human, he was a ticking time-bomb.

Jacob wasn't doing well either. While Embry was frozen in his pain, Jacob had used the chance to try and stop her from leaving. He transformed the moment she was gone from his view, pushing himself to run in order to catch the SUV. He was aching from the strain, but Jacob tried his best to stop the much scarier thought from invading his thoughts - a life without Valerie, the only girl who had helped him think about someone other than Bella. She was his cure, some sort of a magical remedy and while he didn't imprint on her, Jacob believed they would be happy together. He believed he could somehow prevail in the end, but for that to happen, he needed her to stay.

However, despite his best intentions, his pack wasn't quite as ready for him to risk them all in order to stop a girl who had left with her family - a messed up family, but her family nonetheless.

"They won't hurt one of their own," Sam spoke, aware of the heavy atmosphere that had taken over the pack ever since Valerie was gone almost two weeks ago. Embry hardly spoke to anyone, Jacob spends most his time in his wolf form and Paul is constantly shifting because of Rachel who was absolutely heartbroken over the loss of her best friend.

Rachel had been locked up in her room, not allowing anyone in. She believed Valerie was dead, or soon would be. At first, she worried the Silvers would return for the pack, but she trusted Valerie not to tell them the truth. In the end, she knew she left so they would be safe and that was proof enough her best friend was no longer the cold-hearted huntress she appeared to be. It only made it hurt worse.

"You let them take her," Seth spoke up as well, his usual smile gone for weeks now. He was just as saddened, even if he didn't know her that well. Seth was a good soul, but he felt a lot of what his pack brothers did and it didn't help when no one would talk about it openly anymore. Everyone just went back to their days as if she never existed, like she never shook their pack to the core and made them realize how wrong they were in their exclusivity rule about monsters. She had bridged their differences with Cullens, the vampire coven who seemed to care move about her being taken than any of the wolves...even Embry which he couldn't comprehend. Had it been his imprint? Seth would tear the sky open if it meant getting her back.

"She chose to leave," Sam remarked, reminding the young wolf to stay in line and keep his nose down.

"To protect us. She did it to save us and we didn't even try to help her!" Seth nearly toppled the table before him, the cupcake mountain Emily built crumbling down in the process.

"Even the Cullens are trying to find her! Jasper had been out there for weeks, tracking her down! And we just sit around and pretend she wasn't even here to begin with? Like she might not be tortured or killed as we speak? Because she saved us?" Seth couldn't hold his anger back any longer, rushing out to shift in the safety of the great outdoors instead of the cooped up kitchen filled with imprints and wolves.

"He's right," Leah added, setting off to see if her brother is alright. But it was enough to make Sam realize that he's in the wrong for doing nothing at all. He definitely didn't want to start a war with hunters that could put his pack in danger, but when Leah Clearwater stands up for someone, he knew she was right.

"Embry, what do you think? Do you feel her?" Sam turned to the wolf who should be the loudest, the most adamant of them all. Instead, all he got was silence and a shrug.

"She's alive. I know that." Embry decides to give them something to go on, something that he whispers to himself at night to remind himself she's still out there and that he still might see her one day. It's to reassure himself he didn't do the wrong thing by following her order, her plea. It was to push away any feelings of guilt and regret he felt looming at the back of his mind, unforgiving in its might.

"Other than that...she's just gone. I can tell she's alive, but she's gone. I don't really feel her at all." Embry sighed before standing up, evading Sam's attempt to put a hand on his shoulder.

"I believe that's on your side, Em." Emily tried, but the use of his Valerie given nickname irked him in the worst possible way.

"Don't call me that!"

"Embry you need to let this feeling in. Pushing it down won't help you heal." Sam stepped before him, shielding Emily with his body. She had triggered him so easily, just by two syllables and it was clear Embry would crack any day now.

"I can't!" The wolf screamed with all his might, his eyes narrowing as a growl ripped through his throat. He was in so much pain, such indescribable agony that it was better to feel nothing at all. "If I let myself feel, I will die." Embry continued through gritted teeth, his jaw clenching so hard he could feel blood filling his mouth from the pressure he put on his teeth.

"If you don't, you might kill someone." Sam insisted, a dark look on his features reminding Embry just how dangerous a wolf out of control can be. He had to find a way to properly deal with his emotions. But he didn't want to.

"Good. Maybe then she'd come back. Even if she has to kill me after." Embry quipped, walking out of the house as the shaking started and spread through his muscles like wildfire.

'Without her, I'm as good as dead anyway,' he thought before running off into the woods, his pained howl filling the night as it echoed in the forest as her goodbye echoed in his mind.