Before You Go

take my hand and i'll pick you up

A/N - I don't know what this is....

ok so i'm out of lyrics so i'm starting a game- if you can guess the song the title comes from you get a shoutout in the next post. I dunno. Might be fun. Also I love my music so :))))))(no cheating!!!!)

Less than thirty minutes later, the door is slamming open, accompanied by a frantic, "Where is she?" as Murphy rushes inside, eyes frantic. They settle on Clarke, who's sleeping fitfully in Bellamy's arms, instantly and he's at her side before Bellamy can get a word out. "What happened? Is she ok? Is she hurt? Did Finn-"

"Murphy," Bellamy cuts him off sharply, voice low. "She- Jake is dead." There's no way to be gentle about this, but Bellamy's blunt approach still catches Murphy off guard.

"Oh fuck," he whispers, gently rubbing Clarke's arm.

"Yeah. I don't know what happened- suddenly she just showed up here. Found me and Echo on the couch and totally freaked. Had a fucking panic attack in the yard. Carried her in here and let her cry 'til she passed out," Bellamy murmurs, gently stroking her hair. He looks up at Murphy, unshed tears shining. There's nothing he can do for her and that hurts more than anything. "You mind taking her while I call O?"

Murphy swallows thickly but nods, "Yeah. Yeah, of course. Shit." Murphy gently lifts Clarke up a little to give Bellamy room to slip out before taking his place, easing Clarke into his side. Even unconscious, some part of her recognizes him and she lets out a quiet whimper, nuzzling into him. Murphy holds her tighter.

"You're alright, Griffin. You're ok. You're a badass, remember?" The sound of his voice seems to soothe her, the lines in her face relaxing and a small huff escaping her lips. Bellamy shoves aside the small twinge of jealousy he feels at the affectionate display. Murphy doesn't even notice him leave, still murmuring to Clarke. Bellamy closes the door quietly, pulling out his phone. He has a grand total of 17 missed calls between Clarke's friends, O, and Echo. He takes a deep breath before calling his sister.

"Is she there?" Octavia demands instantly, answering on the second ring.

"Yeah, she's here. It's not good, O," he adds.

"What the hell happened?"

"Jake died," Bellamy says, his voice hollow.

"Oh my god. We- we're gonna call an Uber. We're on our way," she says, an almost frantic edge to her voice. Bellamy sighs, rubbing a hand over his face.

"No, I'll come get you," he says. "Murphy's here. Maybe he can get Clarke to talk to him." What Bellamy doesn't add is that him coming to get them gives Clarke an extra 20 minutes before being swarmed. Octavia agrees, telling him to hurry his ass up before ending the call. Bellamy sighs again and walks back inside. This was not how he saw the night going.

"Hey," Murphy says softly, his chin resting on the top of Clarke's head.

"I'm gonna go get Octavia and the others. Try and uh, try and talk to her before we get back. Don't want her to be totally overwhelmed," Bellamy explains. Murphy just nids slightly, movement limited with his position. Bellamy doesn't want to go, doesn't want to leave Clarke. But murphy's going to be able to get through to her better right now, and Bellamy knows that. He may not entirely understand their relationship, but he knows enough to know she's going to need him right now.

So, with a last, long look, he grabs his keys and leaves them curled up on his couch. Murphy will take care of it. Of her.

-

"Griffin, c'mon," a voice huffs, amused. Clarke just lets out a quiet whine and turns her face further into the warm chest she's leaning against. She's not sure who it is yet, just knows it's someone she's safe and comfortable with. It takes a few more seconds to recognize the voice as Murphy's and she pulls back a little, blinking up at him. He smiles sadly at her. "Mornin."

"It's dark out." Murphy smirks, shaking his head. "What happened?"

"Feel like I should be asking you that, kiddo."

"My- my dad died," she says, the words sending a shudder through her. Murphy nods, one hand now combing through her hair. "And I came to see Bellamy, but then-"

"He was with Echo," Murphy supplies.

"Who is she?"

"Some girl he's gone out with a couple times. Tonight was literally their second date," he explains. Clarke winces.

"God I can't believe I did that- I completely fucked up his night. And hers. And yours. And I stole Ravens car, and-"

"Hey," Murphy interrupts gently, seeing her tipping over into hysteria. "Look at me." She meets his eyes. "It's fine. It's all absolutely fine, Clarke. You just found out your dad died, you're allowed to freak out. You're actually being insanely ok."

"I- I feel like I should be upset," she admits. "Like I should feel something. But I'm just... numb. Does that make me a horrible person?"

"No, kid. You're probably kind of in shock. The grief will come later. You're just..." he searches for the right word, "processing."

"Doing a pretty shit job of it," she mutters. "I just- Abby wouldn't stop calling. So I answered and she just said it. The rest is kind of a blur." She shifts so she's leaning onto him, her head resting against his shoulder with his arm around her.

"I know," Murphy says softly. And he does. He went through a similar thing when he found out his dad had died, officially leaving him an orphan. Of course, it was a different situation. His dad was worse than either of Clarke's parents. But he was still his dad. Murphy's coping had a lot more swearing and punching and drinking. Hopefully Clarke can manage better. Hopefully Murphy can help her.

"When are the others getting here?" she asks softly. He raises an eyebrow at her and her lips twitch up in a weak smirk. "Please. As if they'd stay away. They wouldn't give me space even if I asked." Clarke feels Murphy's laugh as much as she hears it, a deep rumbling against her back.

"Bellamy went to pick them up. They'll be here in probably 30 minutes. You wanna talk about it before they get here?" he offers. Clarke chews on her lip, contemplating. Then she shakes her head.

"No, I'm not even sure what there is to talk about. All I know is he's gone. I suppose I'll have to call Abby tomorrow and find out like... what happened."

"No, you don't. There's no reason you need to talk to her. One of us will do that," Murphy insists. Clarke doesn't argue with him.

"Do you think you could, um, can you just talk? I haven't seen you in a while. What's new with your life?" Murphy chuckles again.

"Not anything too exciting to share, kiddo," he says. She shrugs.

"I could use some boring."

"Whatever you want, Griffin," he concedes. So he does. He talks about work, about the last show he was watching. About everything and nothing at once, just giving her something else to focus on, something to fill the silence. Just what she needed.

-

By the time the others get back, Clarke has drifted off again, into a more peaceful sleep. Without a word they all take their places around her, Octavia on her other side with Raven beside her. Jasper steals the chair, kicking Monty away when he tries to join them. Bellamy settles himself on the ground in front of Clarke, leaning back against the sofa.

Murphy quietly fills them in on everything that Clarke told her, which, albeit, isn't much. Then Jasper takes the remote and turns on the TV, selecting Netflix. They watch it quietly until, one by one, they drift off. That's how Clarke wakes a couple hours later, to Chandler screaming about a man-bracelet and her friends all huddled around her. She feels an overwhelming surge of gratitude for the family they've made. She doesn't know what she would have done without them, what she would do now if she didn't have them.

This is the family she chose. The family that's going to get her through this. She sinks back against Murphy with a content sigh, easily falling back asleep, surrounded by the people she loves more than anything.