Cursed Hearts | ATEEZ

015 REALIZE

Not much had changed in my daily routine after the other champions had been chosen as well; I was still waking up every day alone in the mountain of pillows and ocean of sheets, dressing myself in the white training suit, training with King Wooyoung, and then exploring on my own, alone, without my best friend, though the kings would still occasionally keep me company on trips into Martell, during drunken nights, hikes, swims, and late-night trips to the kitchen.

What did change, though, was the intensity with which the King of Autumn had begun to train me, pushing me harder and harder each day, and leaving barely anything but an empty shell weighed down by exhaustion and sore muscles by the time I dragged myself back to my bedroom at night to soak in the bath for hours before heading to bed.

It was clear that I hadn't been the only one to be shaken by the other contestants' and champions' performances that day, and it worried me how, sometimes, the look in King Wooyoung's eyes would change from determination to nervousness, fear, when I missed a punch, failed to dodge his own advances, or wasn't able to hit my target when training with my throwing knives.

Because if the king himself had lost hope that I, his champion, would survive the first eight trials, had lost hope that I could beat the other contestants, had lost hope that I would even make it to the final duel, then what was I even fighting for?

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"Wooyoung, stop," I sighed, running a hand through my hair as I took a deep breath and turned to the male who was breathing harshly as he straightened himself, shaking loose locks of midnight black hair out of his face, hazel eyes filled with confusion, questions, and exhaustion coating the determination he had been trying to hard to uphold during the last couple of days.

"But we're not finished-" the King of Autumn began, his words fading into just another shaky breath as I shook my head, his eyes widening as he took a step closer to me and grabbed my arm carefully, "Are you hurt? Is- Is anything wrong-?"

"I'm fine," I said though it was clear that Wooyoung didn't believe me as his gaze traveled over me, checking, making sure, searching for injuries of any kind, bruises- "We just- I have to stop," I said, grabbing his hand and pushing it off me.

"We're wasting precious time, Wooyoung, a time I will never get back once the trials begin, time I could spend enjoying the last months or weeks of my life, exploring, drinking," I chuckled though the sound was devoid of happiness, of light, ".. having fun, I don't know. But we're not getting anywhere with this. You and I both know that I wasn't the right choice, shouldn't have been your champion-"

"You seriously have to stop saying that, Yuna," The King of Autumn whispered, eyes still searching my face, searching for something, anything, as he said, "You don't really mean that. You know I don't believe that."

"You're such a liar," I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest as I took him in; white suit identical to mine, no crown, no formalities. I had stopped addressing him with his title as well, deeming it unnecessary considering how much time we would spend together during the month of July, during the month of training. Training that hadn't done either of us any good so far.

"Wooyoung, you have to REALIZE that the odds aren't in my favor, in our favor. There are so many other things I would like to do, things that make me happy, things far away from this awful room, from these awful lessons, things that won't make me sad-"

"Is it really that horrible?" The king growled, taking another step closer as I backed away, "Are you honestly telling me that I'm making you sad-?" "Yes!" I exclaimed, making an exaggerated gesture with my hands as I finally let my eyes fall on the endless landscapes of hazel within his own.