I Don't Understand you ||Tsukishima Kei Story

Pov you slap Kiyoko's ass then Tanaka kills you with his glizzy

Y/n's pov

"When the hell did you get food?" I questions.

"When you were sleeping," he says.

"I know for a fact that I did not fall asleep," I say. "I would never ever fall asleep."

"Yeah sure," he rolls his eyes.

"Okay but for real though?" I ask. "When did you get this food, this is a whole ass picnic."

"No shit, it is a picnic," he says.

"No shit, it is a picnic," I mock him. "When did you do all this? The food, did you make it all yourself?"

"I just threw things in my bag," he says. "Nothing special."

"It the morning," I gasp. "You skipped school for me, again."

"I did not skip, I had things to do," he says. "And if I were to skip, I wouldn't do it to plan a stupid date for you."

"God you are so an-" he starts.

"Oh my god," I pull out my build a bear bag. "The cheese string man, this is your present."

"Your stupid bear?" he questions.

"Exactly," I pull it out of the bag. "Suprise hoe."

"It looks like... You," he says. "Why would I want that?"

"It's not a matter if you wanting it," I say. "You're not meant to want it, its supposed to annoy you. See?"

I give it a squeeze allowing my pre-recoded voice to play.

'Hey Kei just wanted to remind you that you're built like the cheese string man.'

"How kind of you," he takes the bear. "Why didn't you add your ugly glasses?"

"I just wanted the deformities to be evident," I shrug.

"Where did you even find a fucked up bear like this?" he asks.

"I have my sources," I say.

"I bet you just weren't able to reach the quality bears," he says.

"That's not the pint," I say. "The point is now I can bother you, and be stuck in your head even when I'm not around."

"You already are," he says.

"I-," I cover my face. "You did that on purpose, you ugly Buffon. I hope you get rotisseried."

"In case you didn't know this, but my main goal in life is not to make you blush like a schoolgirl," he says.

"First of all, I am a school girl," I say. "And second, I call bullshit."

"I also enjoy pissing you off and making fun of you," he smirks.

"As do I," I smile.

"Oh yeah," he hands me a bag. "This is for you, don't make a big deal out of it or I'll leave you here."

"It looks just like you," I say as I pull out the bear. "We thought of the same thing. Hey Kei, you should dress up as a furry."

"Why the hell would do that?" he asks. "I'd look like a double-baked barnacle."

"Well, I think you'd look like a sexy motorcycle," I smile. "Vroom vroom."

"What's up your ass today you little rager?" he asks.

"I put a worm up there, just to make myself lose a few pounds," I say. "What's up your ass Kei?"

"Nothing," he rolls his eyes.

"I bet you stuck a whole ass slinky up there," I say. "Now the real question is, metal or plastic?"

"Why would I shove a metal slinky up my ass?" He questions.

"So are you saying that you'd much prefer shoving a plastic one up there?" I ask.

"I guess you don't want the other gift in that bag," he says.

"Another one?" I question.

I open the bag and there is in fact another gift, a dinosaur plush.

"It's a dinosaur!" I exclaim.

"No shit," he says. "Jared."

"Jared! Its name is Jared," I say. "You remembered. But I said that we couldn't buy them bec-"

"It was buy two get one free," he says. "So technically I di-"

I cut him off by giving him a hug, "Thank you."

"Look who's soft now," he says.

"I don't care," I smile, although he couldn't see. "For all you know I could be drawing stuff with a sharpie on your back."

"I know you aren't," he says. "You're not even allowed sharpies."

"Well, you got me there partner," I laugh. "Guess what?"

"What?"

"I said guess," I say. "Are you deaf or something?"

"I wish he was, then I wouldn't have to listen to you ramble," he says.

"I know you love it," I say. "And I love you too."

"That was terrible," he says.

"Say it back," I say. "Or suffer."

"I'll suffer," he laughs.

"Good," I say. "You deserve it."

Now, who is ready to be depressed next chapter? Because I am ready to laugh my ass off. :)

-Crouton