Fated | Taejin ✔️

Four

Seokjin laid in bed, skimming through the t.v. Channels for a show or a movie he could put on to help him fall asleep. He didn't want a show to watch; he just needed the t.v. on to fall asleep as sleeping alone was new for him. It was not something he had done in a long time.

Being single was challenging and unfamiliar to him as he had not been single since he could remember. Most of his life thus far had been with Hoseok. They had grown together, supported each other through difficult times, loved together, parent together, you name it, they had done.

Jin thought he had met the perfect partner, and he did; at some point, Hoseok was everything he needed in his life until he wasn't.

He didn't know where the break down happened, or when his husband started distancing himself. All he knew was by the time he realized it, their relationship was far gone. Jin had a way of being oblivious to many things, even if it was right before him, he neglected to see it until it was pushed right into his face. Hence how he found out about Hoseok's affair.

When he found out that Hoseok was entertaining someone else, he was lost. Unable to comprehend that his husband had thrown away approximately sixteen years of them being together as if it was nothing.

At first, he wasn't thinking about getting a divorce, he thought maybe they could work through it, but every day it got more challenging for him to look at Hoseok the same way he had before. He had never stepped outside of their marriage. Even before they got married, he was always faithful to Hoseok. He took pride in caring for their daughter and home while balancing his career.

The first time he confronted Hoseok about his affair, Hoseok didn't deny it and admitted it, which was painful for Jin, but something he remains thankful for. He begged him to forgive and promised him it was a one-time thing, something he would not do again. Jin became confused about if Hoseok was being honest, but the more he began digging, the more he found out.

The "one-time thing" was actually ongoing for more than two years, which ultimately broke Jin upon him discovering that. Looking back, he cursed himself for not paying attention to all the little signs that were there. For being oblivious to how secretive and sensitive his husband had grown.

He neglected to recognize the change in Hoseok's behavior, even how he began speaking to him and acting towards him. Though the relationship was never perfect, Hoseok had always been respectful and sensitive towards Jin's feelings. Something that changed within the last two years of their marriage, his respect had lessened, and he became blunter with his words, not caring about its impact.

Jin being the person to internalize his feelings, tried looking past a lot of it until he couldn't anymore. Once Hoseok came clean about everything, he began acting a lot different. It was almost as if he became empowered because Jin allowed their marriage to go on without any consequences for what he had done.

After realizing this, Jin decided he no longer wanted to be married to him, especially if he saw him as a fool who needed him. While he had only known Hoseok, and he was the only man he had ever been romantically involved with. He did not believe in being used, and he surely did not need Hoseok to destroy him or their family any more than he had already done.

He was confident in all he had given their relationship. Despite not being perfect, he did his part and remained consistent. Hoseok, on the other hand, did not; he disrespected their vows. Jin recognized that if he forgave Hoseok, it would not stop him. Instead, he would only be enabling the behavior by letting Hoseok know he was okay with it, and he was not. His husband had looked somewhere else, destroying their vows and the life they had spent years building together.

Coming to terms with everything and knowing what he was able to tolerate, he met with a lawyer and began the divorce process. Two weeks after initiating the process, he found out he was pregnant. It was like the perfect storm was happening. He wanted to walk, but so many things were trying to hold him back. His heart ached, and he cried for hours that night, not knowing what to do.