Making a Chance

Chapter 4:

Pre-game:

My favorite part of being in band is playing the pre-game arrangements. Under the bright lights, just when the crowd is filling the stands. Everyone's pumped, prepped, and ready for the game. The teams are going over last minute plays, making changes, and hoping to pull out on top. Ready to dominate!

I'm not quite game ready. It's just the beginning of the season, and I'm just starting to practice. Running through a million plays, and exercises. Becoming as great as I can, so I can dominate, and win the big game.

What do I mean by this? I'm making the 'blueprints' so to speak. I'm not sure what I should do.

In most movies, and books, the girl usually just goes for it, or either she knew the guy liked her. Neither of these scenarios fit my situation. I can't just going for it and I has absolutely no idea how he feels.

What would he say if I did just come out and revealed my true feelings? How would he react? Would he say he's been waiting for me to tell him, or just laugh in my face.

When I'm going through something like this, I try to find some time for myself to think over "plays" and things. Especially outside. The wind blows away any distractions, so I can focus. It's the perfect place to be when your trying to figure something out. The warmth of the sun, the feel of the breeze, the flow of the clouds above you. It's all very beautiful.

The third weekend from my night with Gage, I went again to my aunt Rachel's. I was having one of my thinking sessions on her back deck, because its one of my favorite places to do so. Her deck stretches from one end of the house to the other. The almost dried up pond, which is still a gorgeous sight, lays just outside my reach. There are beautiful hills in her back yard, that's where your shadows fall. The sun peeks over her roof, shoving enough sun over to project my shadow in the green hills in front of me. I sit on the steps with my elbows on my knees, and face in hand.

I begin to think about how hard it's going to be to even work up the nerve to talk to him about things. I feel a tear find its way down my cheek. I've finally broke. I realize I can't keep all my emotions bottled on the inside. I pull out my headphones, which were playing depressing songs like I always do when I'm upset, and pull my head up to dry my tears. I see a shadow coming behind mine on the ground. Tall, and coming towards me. I hear footsteps getting closer, so I turn around. It's Gage. I turn back and face the pond. I wipe my tears, hoping I hadn't smeared my mascara.

"Are we okay?" He says after five minutes if silence. I paused, not knowing what to say.

"I don't know," I uttered, "Are we?" I asked after a moment, not moving my eyes from ahead. I hadn't looked him into his eyes, knowing if I did, mine would be filled with tears again.

He looked off into the distance, as To figure out what I was focused on, then moved his vocal point to his hands, which were folded ever so gently between his knees.

"I want to be," he said moving closer to me. I heard the anxiety in his voice, like he hoped I shared the desire for us to be okay again. He put his arm on the far side if my waist, not quite putting his arm around me, but to put his arm behind me. I put my head on his shoulder. I felt a tear run down my cheek, when he placed his head on top of mine. I felt his head move and kiss the top of my head.

I looked into his eyes for the first time since we begun our conversation. I blinked, and he was gone. Just vanished. I stand up, and look around, the trees have all turned brown. The house has began to fall in, and the beautiful skies turned gray. The what had just been a normal day outside, turned very macabre.

I woke up on the deck to the sound of aunt Rachel calling me in. I had fell asleep on the deck, and it was supper. Everything I had thought had occurred, had just been a dream. From the conversation between Gage and I, in which he was beginning to reveal his feelings, to the sudden change in setting and an eerie disappearance.

In my dream, I hurt so bad when Gage vanished. I was worried about him. He house, and storm that was coming was lowest on my priority list; Making sure he was okay was first.