covered-up reality

Chapter 2 : Sorry.

Cyrus pov :

So I eventually made it to school, I must say, I have been walking the same route for about 3 years now and it's not even challenging anymore.

I remembered it was an obstacles at first. The beatings plus walking to school, sometimes I didn't make it on time, and would lay on the side of the road for a break. It was a journey. An extremely difficult one.

I can't help but smile.

One thing I will always remember my mother saying and now will forever be my quote is, " To complete the journey is challenging, but nothing in the journey is challenging."

At first I was confused, I never understood. It didn't make sense, but once I got older, I realized what I was missing, what the saying really meant.

To complete a journey is very challenging, it's difficult and hard. You'll need to have the strength, but during the journey, nothing can be too difficult. Nothing can be too hard to accomplish. Yes, sometimes you are put in challenging times, but you always find a way out of it or around. You'll always make a plan, but in the end you make it out stronger. You overcomed the challenge.

I walk into the school building and instantly start being attacked.

Like I said earlier I'm a no body, but Kelsey the head cheerleader and Jason one of the players of our football team are always trying to make my life as horrible as possible.

I get daily punches and punishments from Rick, and when I get to school, Kelsey and Jason with their squad is always ganging up on me, pushing me around and calling me names.

I just can never get a fucking break!

On top of all my beatings, my teachers don't even know I exist, and I have a job with one of the most stuck up and snotty, richest businessman in the town.

I work at Cole Transporters. The owner, Mr. Cole is crap. The only reason why he's business is so successful is because it's the only transportation business in our town and most people in this town is wealthy so they'll require big trucks for their grand items they purchase.

And the fact that he comes from a wealthy family too.

While this sea of people starts attacking me, I'm not shocked. Kelsey or Jason must have set this up so that my day can start off horrible.

Kelsey is a bitch. Jason a dickhead.

I don't think of myself as innocent but the fact that I'm the victim in every situation and I'm always the bearing the consequences is crazy.

I walk as fast to the school bathroom and straight into an empty stall and lock myself in it. I feel as if I am going crazy. I feel as if I'm nuts, I'm going to lose myself and my brain might burst.

I don't why, but I've never thought about my life so much in one day.

Yes I dream about going somewhere else and about me escaping and finally being happy, but not about how I looked and the 'what ifs' .

Locked in this stall isn't helping either, I feel scared and unsafe in here. Like the walls would fall down any second and they'll be there ready to tackle me down and rip me into pieces.

I can't do anything, my body is stiff and the only reasonable idea in my mind is to take out my blade.

Yes, I have a blade. I've always had a blade. I cut, it was an addiction, but now I don't do it when I don't have to. When I can't focus and I need to take my mind if a certain topic or any shit. I need it in times like these.

So I take my blade out and for a weird reason I get this happy and excitement feeling. I haven't cut for about three weeks and my wounds are all healed up.

I'm not dumb and careless and I never cut at my wrist, always in the middle of my arm or higher.

I don't care what people think, but I do what my mother does. So I quickly slice about three or four lines and watch as my thick, red and beautiful blood tickle out if the openings.

I just stare at my arm for a while, looking at the beautiful blood and how pure it looked.

It was hard to believe that such beauty was inside of me, an outsider.

I keep sitting there, I close my eyes and take a deep breath, it's like this is my high.

I feel free, relaxed and...somehow the old me, carefree and happy?

Just as I'm about to cut again, the bell rings for first period and I don't even panic.

This was very unusual. I slowly take a tissue out of my bag and walk out of the stall to the taps. I dampen the tissue and clean my cuts, the apply some bandages I keep I my bag for when I cut and for emergencies.

I never go to the school nurse, that's why I always carry my own shit.

When I walk out of the toilets, the halls are flooded, kids greeting and laughing with each other.

Not feeling like squeezing pass and in between everyone, there are two options, I stay here and wait for everything to settle down or I go a different route which is longer that most students avoid.

I might be lazy, but I'll do anything not to be noticed, so I secure my bag on my shoulders and get ready for my long journey.

As I walk out of the toilet, I make sure my hood of the hoodie is secure and my head is down while I walk.

I don't hide myself because I'm scared of what people will do to me, I'm going through the worst already but this is just to protect myself.

To make myself feel the tiniest normal.

I turn the corner and of course I walk into a walk. Our school is one of those buildings that's weirdly built. We have walls that's not suppose to be there and rooms that are oddly sized.

I step out of the way and stare at the wall, I decided that there was no use wasting my time with a wall and rush to class.

As I'm walking one of my shoe laces comes loose and the fact that I'm clumsy would definitely have an impact of me definitely falling.

I tie my laces and I my mind all I can time about is being late for class, what will I tell the teacher... How?

I'm socially awkward!

I stand up and as I'm walking my left foot gets somehow gets stuck by something and my shoulder collides with something hard.

The impact leaves me wincing on the floor, my whole body arching, all I feel is pain.

I try to stand up, but fail terribly. I can feel the tears at the bream of my eyes.

I'm stronger that this.

I'm just about to try again when a hand sticks out and that's the first time I noticed the person.

I take the hand without looking up and when I'm on my feet, ready to thank this person, it's like my eyes popped out.

Three of the most... Gorgeous boys stood in front of me.

"Sorry." I managed to choked out.

"You should be." said the one standing in the middle and I guess he was the one I bumped into.

"Sorry." I say again. I am totally embarrassed.

The three off them just stood there and look at me. Like they trying to put the pieces together. Like they trying to  solve me. I don't know why, but I hate it.

"Why did you apologize twice?" The blond haired one asked with a smile on his face and I don't know how to answer that.

"Sorry... I mean, uh...I... Sor...uh..." what was I supposed to say.

"Okay let's leave this freak to deal with her...shit." said the one I dumped into and walks off with the other two.

Well that could have gone worse.

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