Trusting My Brothers

Chapter 17

"Stay the hell away from Cole Rivera."

I was in shock. "Excuse me? What makes you think I was with him?"

"We saw you talking to him. Don't act all innocent. You are acting like a slut, throwing yourself at him." yelled Luca.

Oh hell no. I can't believe they had the audacity to do this in the hallway. "Throwing myself at him? Are you being serious right now? He approached me. And I am not a slut. How fucking dare you call me that again? You don't even know me. You guys haven't even tried to get to know me so don't you try to make decisions on who I am friends with. You have no power over me. When you boys start acting like brothers, then maybe.. just maybe I will start to listen. I'm sick and tired of all of you. Get the hell away from me and just leave me alone." And with that, I walk into the classroom.

Everybody's eyes are on me like I was a crazy. Well I guess my brothers are the only one that can make me that way. Honestly, I am kind of embarrassed at the big scene they made, which led me to make it even bigger. My brothers seriously bring out the worst in me and I know I am going to have to answer for this when I get back to the house. I really hope they don't hit me, but I am not going to get my hopes up. Whenever I thought that about Nate, I would still get beaten everyday. I will admit that somedays were better than others, but not by much. My brothers also look much stronger than him so it will probably hurt more. 

I zoned out during class and started thinking, Why me? What did I do to make them hate me so much? Is it because of mom? Is it because she took me instead of them? All the questions kept circling in my head. I never really knew how much I wanted my brothers' love until now. I just want someone to be there and comfort me when I have a nightmare. Someone to hold me when I cry. Someone I can trust enough to tell the truth about my past. Why can't my brother's be there for me? Maybe I don't deserve to be loved. Maybe I don't deserve to have a family. The only people I truly have is Liam, Michael, and maybe Val. Yet, is that enough? 

I didn't realize I started crying until I felt a tear fall on my hand. Wiping them all away before anyone saw, I ask the teacher if I could use the restroom. Once I get into a stall, I just break down. I hate it when people see me cry unless they are my best friend. No matter how much my brothers yell at me, I never let them see me weak. To be honest, that would just give Matteo more ammo over me. Over my dead body. 

Then I got a sudden urge to cut. A voice in my head saying, It is the only way to make it all stop. But I promised Michael and I don't want to break it again. Getting my phone out with my shaky hands, I dial his number. Ring...ring...ring. He finally picks up at the third ring. "Lili, shouldn't you be in school right now?"

"I-I n-need-d you to distract me." I say.

"What's wrong?" he asked in a concern voice.

"I want to cut, but I know how you feel about it and you told me not to cut, so please try to distract me."

"Umm... ok, how's school going right now?" he said in a sort of frantic voice.

I laugh humorless. "That is like the worst question you could ask right now. My brothers and I got into an argument in the middle of the hall."

"Sorry, lil sis. Okay, so, have you made any friends?"

Smiling a little, I say, "I did actually. Her name is Val and we have almost all our classes together. Today was actually her first day. Then there is Cole, though I don't consider him a friend since he is so obnoxiously arrogant. He was actually what the argument was about."

"I'm glad you met Val. As for Cole, if he tries anything, you just say the word and I'll beat his ass." Based on the tone of his voice, I could tell he wasn't lying, but he also found it amusing.

I start to calm down and started joking around. "Who knows? I might say something just to see the show. Plus I think his ego can go down a few notches. You know, you were exactly like him when we first met. You were super cocky but luckily, you had me to save you."

He starts to laugh. "Well, I saved you when you tripped over nothing at the park one day because you got scared from a puppy."

"Hey, that puppy came out of nowhere." I said, laughing with him.

"The dog was literally the size of my hand." He says.

After about another five minutes of talking to Michael, I decide that it was time to go back to class before I got in trouble. Washing my face and drying it, I make my way to class. Luckily, none of my brothers were in the hallways. One thing I learned was that they tend to skip their last class since they hate their teachers. 

Walking into the class, the teacher calls me over. "Why were you gone for a while?"

"Umm... I'm on my period and had a bad cramp so I just sat there for a little bit." I say since the teacher was a woman. Literally, that was always my excuse if I was in the bathroom for too long. Plus, I am actually on my period right now and am experiencing some stomach pains.

"Oh, Okay sweetie. Go ahead and sit down. Tell me if they get worse." she says.

"Thank you, Mrs. Lisa." She was the nicest teacher besides Ms. Vera. 

About thirty minutes later, class was done and I now had to go home. I get to the front of the school to see my brothers waiting for me. We walk to the car silently and then drive home. The silence was excruciating because the longer it is, the worse it will be after. Getting home, we go through the same drill as when I first got in trouble at school. Matteo slamming the door and dragging me inside.

All of my brothers are there, of course, and Luca fills them in on what happened. Let's just say they are more mad today than they were last time.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Liliana?" said Nico.

I respond with, "I didn't do anything wrong. They started it and I couldn't just stand there and take it."

"You need to learn to not do stuff like this in a public area." Lorenzo says in his cold tone.

"Matteo was the one that started yelling first. Why am I the only one getting blamed?" I asked.

"You are blowing this way out of proportion." said Lorenzo.

"Stop acting like a fucking baby." Nico says.

"He had a perfectly good reason; he was trying to warn you." Savio said.

"He had a perfectly good reason? Are you being fucking serious right now? So a warning consists of name-calling? Do you know how much it hurts to be called a slut or whore? As I told them earlier, you don't know anything about me. Don't ever make assumptions about someone when you don't know them. Did you ever think for one moment that I may not have had a good life? You assholes hate me for no reason and I can't stand it anymore. I am done listening to you."

Right before leaving, I add, "A proposito, so qual è la tua attività di famiglia. Forse avresti dovuto controllare meglio i precedenti.(By the way, I know what your family business is. Maybe you should have done a better background check.)" 

I walk out of the room and head to my bedroom to get changed into my workout clothes and go to the gym. None of them sided with me. None of them wanted to hear my side of the story. I put all of this into the punching bag.