Trusting My Brothers

Chapter 26

Nico asked the question that I was dreading. "You told us that your parents neglected you. So why did you use the word abusive?" 

Damn it. How could I have slipped up? I know that I may have told them soon, but I didn't think it would be this early. They may have been sweet today, but how long will that last? My brothers will look at me in pity and I don't want that. I just want things to stay how they are now: with my three eldest brothers trying to bond with me. I don't want them to repetitively say they're sorry, because that won't change anything.

But, what if telling them will help me. What if saying something might help me truly heal? I mean, yes the nightmares are less frequent now, but maybe I just need to be able to get everything that happened to me out in the open. Maybe it was all the lies holding me back from being able to move forward from that chapter of my life.

Making my decision, I decide it's time to be honest. In fact, I think they already pieced it together. "Because they did abuse me. Both mentally and physically."

"God, I was hoping I was wrong. I was hoping that you just accidentally used the wrong word. I can't believe my little sister was abused and I couldn't do anything." whispered Lorenzo under his breath, but I could still hear him. I can tell he's upset, but not at me. He's mad at himself.

"Why the hell didn't you tell us?!" He yelled, almost like he was still pleading that what he heard wasn't true. He was hoping that I would say that I was joking. I felt my heart break at how much pain he looked like he was in, and it was because of me.

"I'm going to explain the full story, so no interrupting please. When I was five, my mom started yelling verbal insults. Since I was young, I never realized that what I was going through was considered abuse. But then I met Liam and then knew that what mom was doing was wrong. He helped me out and was the first person I told, but I never talked to the authorities because Nate came into the picture. He started physically abusing me when I was ten and I couldn't tell anyone because he was on the police force." Tears were running down my face by this time and I saw them on my brothers face as well.

Taking a deep breathe, I continue the story. "At first it was a little slap here and there, but then they turned into full on beatings. There were days I couldn't go to school since I could barely get up. Liam dragged me to the police station when he saw me one day, but none of them believe me and when Nate found out, I got punished. After that day, I never tried to inform anybody. Liam was the only good thing in my life and he ended up moving away. I became closed off and the only person I would talk to was Michael. But then Michael left as well and I had no one but myself. I wore hoodies to school everyday as well as make up to hide all the cuts and bruises. No one ever noticed me and I was glad since they couldn't see me as the broken girl I am. I tried to hide that from you so that you guys wouldn't pity me. So that you guys wouldn't send me away because you never wanted a sister who was dama..."

Nico cuts me off. "Don't you dare call yourself damaged or broken. Because you are not. You hear me? You are strong for fighting through all of that and surviving. You could've given up, but you didn't. Instead, you endured it and fought through it."

"Am I strong? If I was, then why did I cut? Why did I find that pain was a good way of coping with everything? Why did I find peace in watching m-my blood drip down my arm and feeling physical pain rather than mental pain?" And I just slipped again.

"Wait, you cut yourself?" asked Savio to which I just nod.

He looked like he was about to explode, but then took a deep breath. "How long? And why would you do that to yourself?"

"Umm, ever since Michael left. The abuse started getting worse, to the point that I should have gone to the hospital but didn't. I stopped cutting though about a week ago. I will admit that I have thought about it since then, but I resisted the urge to."

"Let Nico look at them." Enzo said and I spin around so fast that I get a little dizzy.

"Excuse me? Why?"

"Because he has some medical experience and I want to make sure that they healed properly." He replied, still looking like he was about to have a breakdown. 

Hesitantly, I nod and hold out my arm to Nic. He gently grabs it and pulls up my sleeve. There, we see over a dozen lines that I cut and a couple of them are still red due to them being newer ones. Nico's face looks pale, almost like he is in the presence of past demons. 

Not being able to look at my brothers anymore, I look at some of the members working. Some of them are glimpsing our way, but I doubt that they can actually hear our conversation. I wince and turn my head back around when Nic touches one of the newer scars. 

"Sorry." He says, putting my sleeve back down for me. "They look like they are healing okay. I can give you some cream that should keep the new scarring to a minimum."

"Thank you." I say and give my three brothers a hug. They immediately wrap their arms around me and I start crying again. I can feel water dripping on my head, which told me that they were too. This hug is just for listening to me tell my story, and even if there is a small piece they don't know, I still feel the weight on my shoulders just disappear. They handled this a lot better than I thought they would and as much as I wish I wasn't, I am starting to love them. They are my family and I hope they don't break the trust that I just gave them. I hope they follow through with their promises and protect me.

We eventually let go, wiping our faces to get rid of any sign we were crying, and Hunter comes over to tell Enzo something about Nate. When Hunter leaves, Enzo looks like a kid who just had his first piece of candy. He starts to leave but I grab his arm.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"I'm going to go make sure that son of a bitch suffers for what he did to you." He gives me a kiss on my forehead and heads back to the room. I let a small smile spread across my face and Savio takes me to Enzo's office, where I stay and read one of the books on his shelf. Eventually, I fall asleep on the small couch in the room that is surprisingly comfortable.