You + Me = ?

Sine-Gordon Equation

The Present, 2017

This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make.

After crying my eyes out, I drove to the Han River, I spent the entire day there just thinking about everything that I learnt and what to do with all that information. It's obvious that nothing good will come from me traveling all the way to Brazil to save some boy that I don't know.

I remember when I was around eight years old and my parents were on edge around me, they had a hard time figuring out how to break the adoption news to me. But the thing is, I already knew that they weren't my real parents, and even though it's normal for adopted children to ask about their birth parents and where they came from, that bit of information wasn't important to me.

I already had a mother and a father who cared for and protected me, why should I seek out another set of parents who wanted nothing to do with me? Of course my parents were happy when they realized that I was happy with my situation, like any other parents they worried a lot about me.

It didn't make it any easier that I was a gifted child who hardly showed her emotions, and the fact that I earned a bit of fame by solving one of those old and annoying math problems made them worry even more about me. I think the straw that broke the camel's back came in the form of me refusing to go to Brazil with them one summer.

Even though I was born there, I wanted nothing to do with that country, and it was such sentiment that convinced my parents I should see a therapist, but that's a story for another day. And one other thing keeps crossing my mind, if this Maria Luiza person is my birth mother, then that would make her son my half-brother.

Wouldn't I be a bad person if I left my brother to die?

Why the hell is this happening to me?

I sigh softly as my phone buzzes in the pocket of coat, I wipe my tears quickly and clear my throat before answering his call. "Yah Song Minho! Where the hell have you been?"

"Uh...I'm sorry but this is Kang Seung Yoon, we met that time at the dorm."

I close my eyes briefly, "oh, hello. But why are you calling me from Minho's phone? Is he okay?" he sighs heavily.

"I don't know what happened but he's been drinking all day, so he's a bit drunk at the moment. The other members have different schedules, and I have to leave soon. I don't want to leave him alone like this, so if it's not too much can you come over?"

I get off the car hood with a sigh, "okay, I'll be there in a few minutes."

Just what is going on with today?

When I got to Minho's dorm I found him sitting on the floor in his bedroom with bottles of soju by his feet. I sigh at the sight of him as I sit on the chair by his computer desk.

"I was worried about you."

He chuckles at that, "were you?" he bows mockingly at me, "I'm sorry."

I raise my eyebrows at him but choose to ignore his behaviour, "did something happen? You left this morning without saying anything."

He laughs at that then points at me, "you, you," he slurs heavily, "you like him don't you? Isn't that why you never listened to me when I told you to stay away from him? Is that why he feels like he has the right to say whatever he feels like to you?"

I sigh, "what are you going off about?" he takes a sip of the alcoholic beverage, "I think you've had enough of that."

He shakes his head, "I don't care what you think Lee Hei Ryung. Why don't you just take your lying, cheating ass off my chair and get the fuck out?"