it's a bit complicated

6 chapter.

WHY ME??

This the question that had always invaded my thoughts. This is not the first time I've been treated this way. It has been the same as long as I can remember.  It was always the same😔. I was always alone. I was always compared. I dont know why??. It was always so lonely for me. The difference is, my uncle beats me and my family compared me. My family thought my sister was better. My uncle thinks i'm  unlucky. The common thing is , I am never wanted. Never. It used to hit differently back then. But now I dont feel a thing. Back then I used to believe that there was no angle through which we can be compared , she  and I were two different beings. I hate copying and she was a good photocopier. She was girly and I was a tomboy. She liked make up and I was always simple. She was better. I knew. But i never felt remorse towards her because she was family. I loved her no matter what.

But it all ended. Everything.

Since I was young , i had a problem. I never wished to lived. I always prayed to god to take me back. While everyone would be wishing for toys at my age I was crying because I wanted to die. According to me , life was no use for me. But then some one told me to cling onto something. For thirteen years , I felt no emotion for my family. Then I cling onto them. I started to love. I decided to do what my parents wished me to do. But it wasn't enough. It was never enough.

They always compared me with her and I hated it. In order to avoid there bickering,  I was always outside. I would go to school then to my job where i worked as a waiter and then to the rooftop of the flats near by. I would do my homework there and watch the stars there.i would just go home to sleep. But still I loved them. I used to take their photos secretly , make their videos or simply record the conversations among family members. I used to watch them or listen to them. They always made me smile.

But then I lost the thing that was my source of life...

OH LORD!! I NEVER ASKED FOR ANYTHING...JUST ANWER THIS ONE"WHY ME??"

My uncle adopted me. He had no choice. I was underage and had no where to go. I thought they are adopting because they wished to be my family but it was for insurance money. Shock.

It's alright. I'll make it through.

The beatings started with just scolding and then went to slaps and then after a year or so it was full on trials.

Ah!! My fucked up life. With this thought , i climbed out of shower. The water was red . All the blood removed , head tended and cuts patched up. I got ready for school.

Just another day of my pathetic life.

LETS GET THIS OVER WITH.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: SUGGESTIONS R WELCOMED.

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