Across the Globe [COMPLETE]

A Walk Down Memory Lane

PART 2

UNDERSTORY

The bush, shrubs and herbs,
all lay in the in-between.
Where small animals and insects,
find a home in its refugee.

The canopy provides shelter,
protecting them from storms and wind.
But be careful with the predators,
that lurk in the shadows within.

-----

10TH OF JULY

Antonella

It's barely been 24 hours since I left Sam at the airport, and still, sitting here in the lounge, I realise the room feels empty... and lonely. I'm used to Sam not being around as she's either at university or work most days, but this feels different. Knowing she is far away now, flying halfway across the country the same way I did so many years ago... It brings back so many emotions I've locked away.

As if on queue with my feelings, my gut twists, so I take another sip of chamomile tea. I need to be positive, I know this trip with Em will be good for her. The girls have been inseparable since they were young, and Em is such a good influence on Sam! I still remember the few years of school before the girls met, when Sam had turned quiet and even a little bit distant...

I shake my head, finish the last sip of my tea and get up from the couch. I head to the kitchen and leave the empty mug in the sink without rinsing it.

"Sam would scold me for leaving it here," I say to myself.

I walk over to the hallway, and before I realise where I'm going, I find myself in front of Sam's bedroom door. I open it slowly, and stay under the threshold, not daring to invade her space.

The room is small, but spacious. The bed is under the window to my left, and it's neatly made, the grey and yellow duvet tucked perfectly under the mattress, and the multiple pillows and cushions arranged in perfect order. The same way it's always been. To my right and against the corner, it's her desk, which is almost empty. It's been wiped clean, and there's a pile of books perfectly lined on the edge. Sam's bookcase is in the opposite corner, full to the brim with copies of so many books, I wonder if she'll ever get enough time to read them all.

Photos of Sam are framed and hanged all over the walls, creating a beautiful path through memory lane. I can't help myself, so I walk towards them and run a finger through one of the pictures. It's one of Sam from right after we moved. She's sitting on a playmatt on the floor of this very room, and I can see the cot in the back, in the same spot where her bed is now. She's smiling up at me as she shows me a doll.

Those first years were so complicated. The first few days after the accident, Sam used to ask about her father all the time. We had to stay in New Zealand for two weeks while the police investigation was underway and funeral arrangements were done. And Sam would always wake up in the middle of the night screaming. She'd tell me about the horrible nightmares she had, and cry herself to sleep once more. By the second week, the nightmares stopped, and just like that, there were no more questions, no more crying and missing daddy at night.

It was as if Morris had been completely wiped off her memory.

We moved to Argentina shortly after that, and after a couple of weeks of Sam still not talking about her father, I got worried. That was the first time I visited a counsellor with her. She was a lovely lady, and explained to me that sometimes kids deal with loss by forgetting about things that are too hard to deal with. She said it was fairly common, and that the memories might return on their own.