ForNever

Eight

I saw four messages, Facebook messenger, all from Eric, or Efrain? I don’t know! There are also two missed calls. Skype. Still him. My mind is twirling. Facts roar in my head.

I used to be so keen with observations but now I’m caught lacking on it.

Judging people is not my thing. I'm not in line with destructive assumptions but this clearly  deserves it. If someone lies to you, it is their fault. If you saw the signs yet you just didn't mind, then it is partly your fault too.

Am I over-thinking again just like what my friends say? Is my mind over working again? I need answers. I have to know the truth behind this. I need to talk to him.

Without any warning being sent, I made the decision to call him.

“Finally, you called, I---“

“Who are you?”

“What? Hey Kate, is this---“

“Are you really Eric Marquez? Tell me the truth.”

And there, I said it. Straight forward, I let it out. I hate confrontations. I always find myself avoiding it cos I hate too much drama. I’ve had enough drama. Now, this unwanted circumstance made me do it.

“I don’t like this sound of you, I---“

“Just answer me!”

I can’t help but to raise my voice. I have all the rights to do so. I feel deceived and I don’t deserve it. My love ones know that I really disgust the sensation of blood pumping fast and strong through my veins brought by the feeling of being fooled. I hate when people tried lying to me.

Well, everyone does.

“Hey, are you mad? What’s happening?”

“Did you just ask me what’s happening?”

Wow, he has the voice to ask me that and act like a freaking innocent guy. How could he…

“Yeah, what’s---“

“No, you tell me what’s happening. Tell me your real name.”

“What? Eric”’

“Oh, come on! Tell me!”

“Please---“

“It’s Efrain, isn’t it?”

“I guess you finally figured it out. Yeah, it is, in a way. And yes I am that guy, that guy months ago.”

 “Why do you have to do that to me? You think this is a game? You made me look stupid!”

“Hey, please just calm down and let me talk. I never meant to make you feel that way. I was just trying to get into your life again. Please, let me explain. Promise me, you’ll keep quiet and hear me out, okay?”

“Okay. Speak now.”

He lets out a deep breath and starts to speak. My senses tell me that hearing him out is not a good idea but I should give him the benefit of the doubt. My finger tapped something as he starts his speech.

“Remember when you just deleted me in your friends list?---

“But I—“

“Hey, ou promised me, you will not speak ‘til I’m done”

“Okay, sorry, go on.”

“So, remember that? You left me hanging just like that and I try to think for a reason. I tried, but there’s none. I told you, I’m not that kind of person that likes long chats. I’m not into too much typing, you know. Well, yeah you might know that, but the point is when I talk to you, I end up typing long things, longer than my birthday messages to my family. I never opened up to anyone that much. You know me more than anybody else. I get hooked with every conversation and only you can have that effect on me. I always told you that I like you but you always end up sending “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA”, thinking that I’m just kidding, and all I can do is to just laugh with you. Can’t I just like you and you just accept it?"