Father Figure (BNHA)

Saviour

Manual was nice enough. Too nice, sometimes.

He watched over his interns carefully, making sure they were all okay, which, while good for the hero, meant Izuku was having to act all goody two shoes constantly.

Even the building they were sleeping in had more than enough cameras to stop any midnight killing sprees.

And Izuku was staring to realise how much he relied on violence.

On killing.

His hand would always stray to his pocket, seeking out his knives, either to kill or just to reassure him, he never really knew.

He would pass heroes on patrol and wonder what their quirk was. What its weaknesses were and how to best defeat them.

He would purposefully sneak into alleyways, seeing if there was anyone there, wanting nothing more than to see scarlet blood pour over the stony floors.

And he felt weak.

Every day, people would barge into him, shout at him to do what they want, no matter how difficult that may be or how unsure he was, he would be put into situations where there was nothing he could do. Where he was powerless.

And he hated it.

Though, there was something that he kept to himself. Everything else, he would rant to Tododorki about, or call Tomura about but this, he knew he could never mention.

He could never mention his doubt.

He didn't regret becoming a villain. It gave him a family and control over his own life, his own future, but, every now and them, he would save someone.

Noone big, he was just doing his work as a "hero", he had to save people, he couldn't avoid it.

But, as the days got on, he found that he didnt mind saving people. And that, at times, he enjoyed it. He looked forward to it.

And that was the thing that truly scared him.

He saved a child being attacked by a villain, and he felt joy pooling in his chest.

Happiness and pride and emotions he had never felt before but could almost name.

In that moment, he felt powerful. As he stood there, child clutched to his chest, glaring at the villain as Manual moved to attack, he felt powerful.

It felt amazing. Unbelievably amazing.

And he hated every second of it.

Todoroki smiled slightly to him, congratulating him on saving the girl, who ran back to her parents, with a glint in his eyes that meant Izuku knew it wasn't real.

Todoroki would have left that girl to die. He wouldn't have rushed in to save her, ignoring Manual's annoyed shouts.

Todoroki would have done what he was suppost to, not letting some heroic impulse control him.

And, for a second, Izuku felt hatred towards the villain boy who smiled at him with that fake smile, filled with disappointment and dismay.

His hand reached for his pocket, hoping to wrap around the handle of his familiar blades.

Instead, he found first aid supplies.

Stupid hero costume.

Manual smiled weakly at Izuku, with a small smile that told him he had fucked up.

Doubly fucked up.

"Izuku, you cant go running in like that.  You could have gotten injured." Manual chastised.

Izuku smiled slightly and apologised to Manual, promising he wouldn't do it again, his eyes fixed on Todoroki's as he spoke.

As he lied to both of them.

Sat on his bed that night, listening to the wind blow though the open window as Tomura's voice echoed from the phone.

Watching the skyline, he saw the occasional blur that he recognised as heroes, rushing to save people. To feel that pride and joy.

He sighed. And continued watching them.

They wouldn't feel guilty about it. They embrace that feeling, based their lives around it. They feel it every day with no problems, because that's who they are.

And Izuku can't even tell the people he loves most, that love him most, that sometimes, he wishes he was one of them.

One of those dark blurs on the city skyline.

One of the heroes.

Tomura continues to talk. Apparently Stain has been up to something and Tomura is not happy about it. He called Izuku just to rant, which is never a good sign.

If there's something Tomura chooses to go that extra effort to talk about, then it won't go well, especially not for the person being talked about.

"Hey, Izuku." Izuku turned his eyes back to the phone, expecting Tomura to look annoyed, like he always does when Stain gets mentioned, but, instead, Tomura gives him a gentle smile, his red eyes warm and caring as they look at Izuku.

The two sit in silence. Tomura was never very good with words, not emotional ones anyway, but Izuku doesn't expect him to say anything.

He doesnt expect the normal "you can tell me anything", the cliche "I'll be here if you need me" or anything else.

Izuku knows what Tomura means.

"Okay, dad, but I'm fine. Just missing being home. Hey, has Giran found anymore new recruits yet?"

Tomura nods slowly, then starts talking about whatever Giran qualifies as recruits. Izuku didnt have to listen carefully to know Tomura was annoyed.

So, once again, he turned his eyes to the skyline and to the dark blurs.