Hamburr ~Stop Caring ~

Chapter 1

Aaron Pov

It was a long day at work and I felt extremely tired, I have no idea why the heck I don't resign. Well anyways I had just finished up an abuse case with George Eacker and Maria Lewis. They successfully divorced--thanks to me. It's my job as an attorney, I am often involved with relationship cases, since I best fit those. I've learned how people lie to try and hide their pains...I remember my uncle Timothy would fancy beating me a lot. I shake the pain filled memories away as I walk over to a bench in the rain and see a sobbing figure, he was covered in a mix of rain and blood and was shivering. I walk over to him and try to recognize him....ALEXANDER??? 

"Hamilton?" I was pretty shocked and hell- I really swore to myself that I hated his stupid non stop personality and how he seizes every opportunity from me. But this is just sad. I haven't seen him ever since what, college? 

Alexander looked up in shock and quickly wiped away his tears, looking down into the puddle.

"M-Mr. Burr--sir." 

Alexander Pov

The night was horrible. Why the hell couldn't I speak up...I always did that. I was always so brilliant and yelling and putting people in their place. But I just can't...not against James Reynolds. He cared about me...that's why he's hurting me. It's okay for him to beat me. It's okay because I know I deserve it and this is the best way to teach me anything at all...it's not like anyone can love me. I thought John did...he's dead. Eliza...dead, my only two friends, gone. I still remember seeing their dead bodies. I shudder at the memories and stay on the bench. It's not like anyone cares, everyone hates me. No one can like me. No one can love me. No one. 

I saw none other than Aaron Burr. Great. Was he going to beat me too? Adams did, I remember it very clearly. I reply with a "M-Mr. Burr...sir." God. he's gonna be suspicious now dammit. I feel his hand on my shoulder and I flinch back, in response he lifted his hand. I think Burr has always hated me, but he was still kind about it. He never scolded or yelled or hit anyone...He's also really tall and cute--But if I think about him it'll be of no use. There's no escape. No one can help me, after all I did legally marry James. He loves me...he's just stressed. yeah. I know he never meant anything, I know he loves me. He's the only one who can. 

I get up to wipe the blood off of my neck and pull myself together. I felt anxious as Burr examined me, his eyes were a beautiful hazel. I couldn't look up to meet him. 

"Alexander, are you alright?" His voice was soft and calm, it felt like I could trust him. No...no why would he care? Burr hates me. No one loves me. He doesn't care. No one cares. 

"I'm okay, Burr. I just got into a little fight, not much." He raises an eyebrow and I feel anxiety rush over me. The wounds on my back began to ache, and I winced as it stung. 

"It's very late, It can be dangerous at these times. Would you like me to walk you home?" 

That would be amazing...but James would be there. James was looking for me. He's probably looking for me right now. Oh no...he'll realize I'm gone. He's going to beat me again. Well...it's okay because I love him...? He loves me. He does. I shake my head worriedly and keep my eyes averted to the ground. It doesn't feel right convincing myself that James loves me. But what does it matter?

Aaron Pov

I don't recall attending their wedding, but I was sure that they were happy. I had a feeling that Alexander was lying to me, why the hell would anyone trust me anyways. I don't know, maybe because I literally specialize in that field! 

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to stop by my house? It's near by. I wouldn't mind." I try to offer him a place to stay and some money. He just averts my gaze. 

"Thank you, sir. I-I'm fine...I'll get going." But what if he's getting hurt? I want to stop him and hug him and tell him everything would be alright...but it's not like he even likes me. In fact, he hates me so much I remember once back at Princeton he teamed up with Jefferson instead of me. Now that's comedy. Whatever it's my job to help him. 

"Call me Aaron." I say after a while. He turns around and finally looks me in the eye, he looks confused but then smiles weakly...GOD that's cute.

"Let me help you, Alexander." I try to tell him one more time. I need him to listen to me. That's how I can help him, whether it's James or not. "Thank you. But I don't need help." He walked back around the curb and I watched him walk away. 

Alexander Pov

I teamed up with Jefferson because John wanted to make fun of me. Well. He's dead. Why was Burr being so kind to me? Whatever...only James can be kind. And he could help me. I'm fine, I don't need his help. He's the same guy who I had a crush on in college BUT he...well I can't think of a reason to hate him but I don't care. I don't need his help. James can help me...he always does. I walk into the house and I see him drunk out of his mind. 

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!" I winced at the words and he grabbed my throat, I felt panicked but It's for my own good. I deserve this. His face moved closer to me and I felt myself choke out a sob from the pain. 

"P-please...I-I love you-u...I'm s-sorry..." He screams and kicks me continuosly. Every single kick, every punch, every twist, never hurt as much as the words. 

"You're a Goddamn curse. NO ONE CAN EVER LOVE YOU. YOU'RE FUCKING LUCKY TO HAVE ME. YOU'RE LUCKY I DON'T KILL YOU RIGHT HERE!!" He screams into my ears, I screamed out as he took the shattered bottle glass and tore my shirt off, every cut stabbed into my skin. Every time I screamed, he would laugh and push the bottle harder. 

"I-I'm a c-curse...I'm l-lucky to-o have y-you..." I repeat. He's right. he's right. he's right. I am a curse. Everyone who loved me died, it's all my fault. Eliza. John. mom. dad. my brother. my cousin. Everyone. No one can love me...no one. 

~~~

I woke up curled into a ball in the basement. James must have thrown me here. I hated it, whenever there'd be a storm he'd push me in and I could remember the night of the hurricane. I didn't know what to do so I tried to crawl to the corner. OW. DAMMIT. My wrist started to ache and my legs felt numb. It was cold and damp...the pain can never end. I deserve this. All of this. I can wait...I'll wait until James leaves. Then I'll go up and work. I can do it. it's just a few scratches...

It's not like it's the end of the world.