Under One Sky

Isekai Gone Wrong

"You're hopeless," the elven king said.

"Yeah, but guess who's ruddy fault that is!" I bellowed.

I was in the throne room for the kingdom of ... I don't know — don't care either. But there were a lot of pointy-eared people calling themselves elves. Some of them had armour and swords so I figured they were knights, and the rest had robes, pants, all sorts of clothes. Granted, it looked elegant but I didn't have time to stop and admire all this.

"What's the ruddy idea," I continued my tirade. "Bringing me all the way here from my world so I can defeat Vernilla —"

"Vernileios," corrected an old.

"Whatever! Well, I don't know who he is —"

"She," corrected the same woman.

"Oh for the love of —"

"Sorry."

"Right," the king said. "Well, none of us specifically wanted you here. We did the summoning rites and the magic just did its work."

I raised an eyebrow. "And?"

"And it's your destiny to save our world."

"But I don't care about your world. I wanna go back home."

The king covered his face in his hands and sighed. What a weak old codger.

"Okay. I'm out," I said. I turned to walk away, but my feet felt like stone and I couldn't move. What the hell?

"Oi," I said. "What's up with this? I can't move!"

The king stroked his white beard. "Strange. Alepha," he turned to the old woman who corrected me earlier, "what is the meaning of this?"

"The magic binds him," she croaked. "He cannot abandon the quest for which he was summoned."

Wow. Just wow.

"Fine," I said. "Tell me where Vernilla —"

The king interrupted, "Vernileios —"

"WHATEVER, JUST GIVE ME SOME GOD DAMN DIRECTIONS TO HER LAIR."

"Well, about that …"

I had a bad feeling "Yes?"

"We don't really know where she lives. You must seek her out yourself."

Bloody excellent.

When I'm done with this Vernilla-whatever-her-name-is, I'll destroy this damn kingdom and find my own way back to earth.