Reincarnated as a Female Yukihira Soma

Chapter 3

Finally finished with my exams!! 

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I woke up to darkness and the smell of medicines mixing together in the air. I tried to raise my left hand, only to feel something holding it down. 

"I...is someo..ne...the...re?" I rasped out, surprised at how dry my voice sounded to my ears. How long have I been out for my throat to be extremely dry? A week? A month? Please don't tell me it's been a year or more!!! 

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard the door open and heard some footsteps approaching me. 

"W..who?" I roughly spoke, internally wincing when I heard my voice. "W..wate...r."

Fortunately, they understood me despite the hoarseness of my voice and I soon felt the bed I was lying in move up until I was in a sitting position before a cold glass touched my lips and cold water entered my desert-like mouth. I eagerly took a couple of big gulps, only to stop when the cup was lifted from my still dry lips. I tried to check if my mouth was hydrated enough by opening and closing my mouth a couple of times, satisfied to feel it moist.

"Who a...re you?" I asked, glad that I was finally able to speak normally without feeling thirsty and sounding raspy. 

"It's me, Soma." I heard a familiar man's voice. "Do you recognize me?"

"...Dad?" I asked after thinking for a couple of seconds. I heard a sigh of relief from my left. 

"Yes, Soma, it's me." he said. "I'm with a doctor who will check to see if you're alright, okay?"

"Will you stay with me?" I asked him, scared at the thought of being left behind with a stranger who I cannot see. Oh yeah, I still have to ask about that.

"Dad, why is there a cloth over my eyes?" I asked him, nervous when all I received as an answer was silence.

"...Dad?" I said with a tint of panic, the worst scenarios flooding my head as I heard the loud thumping of my heart.

"Soma, calm yourself down and listen to me, okay?" he said seriously, making me unconsciously swallow my saliva which was forming in my mouth due to worry. 

"A-alright." I said with a slight nod, feeling him (or who I assume to be him based on the position of his hands and voice) hold both my hands. 

"Soma," I heard him take a quiet deep breath. "you're blind."

I felt my mind shut down, not being able to process his words completely. No, it was more like the conscious part of me was rejecting his words.

"Hahaha, what a funny joke, Dad." I said, trying to reject reality. "Can you tell me the truth now?"

I expected, no, hope for him to laugh with me but all I got was a solemn "I'm sorry."

I felt like I was dowsed with ice cold water in a wintery day, feeling my body, my mind, and my heart numb from anything. 

"...What?" I could only whisper with anguish. I knew how to live partially blind, in my past life, I had glasses with a grade of 700. However, I could still slightly see and I had glasses to help me. To hear that I am completely blind....I felt the hot tears welling up in my eyes and falling down to my chin. So, I still have my eyeballs, huh. 

"C-can it be fixed?" I asked desperately, trying to find solace from something. 

"We're looking for ways, Soma." my father said, avoiding my question. I frowned and asked another question, not satisfied with his answer.

"Is there a way? Has it been done before?" This time, I received no answer, causing me to feel helpless. I see, so he was just trying to raise my hopes up. But, dad, did you know? Giving false hope is worse then telling the harsh truth. 

"...Please leave." I said, turning around to face my right side with difficulty. "I want to sleep."

I didn't hear any reply, perhaps they understood me and my need of quietness, but felt the bed go back to it's original flat position for me to lie down comfortably before the sound of footsteps faded away along with the door opening and closing. Once I heard the door close, I turned around and randomly flail my arms around me to check if someone was with me and felt no one. Feeling that I'm finally alone, I let the dam inside of me break. Immediately, I sat up to curl like a ball as I felt my tears rushing down my face, wetting the cloth covering my eyes.

Why was life so unfair? I was living an ordinary life but got killed just because of a little fight I had with a friend. I never asked for death. I never asked for anything more. I was satisfied with my dull life. So why did I have to die?! It's so unfair. I don't deserve this. Why must I suffer this much? I did nothing wrong. I never did anything bad enough to warrant this life. Why must I live another life? I'm so tired. I want to give up. Can I give up? Hey, if I die right now, will I finally rest in peace without opening my eyes again? 

I cried and wailed and shouted silently, knowing that even if I am heard, no one would care. Finally, after what felt like hours, I felt my body slowly shut down and I lifelessly flopped down on the bed. I felt my throat burn with dryness as my head started to hurt but I tried to ignore it and wait for the silent sleep to bring me out of here for at least a few hours.