Red vs Blue x Male OC / Season 2

S2 • E2 - Motion to Adjourn

We now return to the Firefight outside the Blue Base with Church, Doc, Tex, Ash, and Tucker huddled behind a large rock.

Ash: Okay, Tucker, we need you to get up there, help Caboose shore up the defense, establish a suppressing fire, and hold that position until further notice.

Tucker: I didn't even know what half of that meant.

Church: Just go over to Caboose's rock, and fire your gun a bunch.

Tucker: That rock? Yeah, I don't think so.

Church: We do not have time to discuss this.

Tucker: "Sure, no time for you to discuss it. You guys get to hang out here with Nancy No-Bullets shootin' the breeze. Meanwhile, I'm out there, running around, eating a machine gun sandwich." He remarked.

Ash: "Tucker, we're gonna give you covering fire."

Tucker: Covering fire? Unless that means you're gonna build a huge, bullet-proof wall between me and them, I think you need to come up with a new plan. Preferably one that involves me keeping the same quantity of blood that I have right now. Also Ash. Why aren't you using any of your gadgets?! Or your sniper rifle?!"

Ash: "Ok first off one: I'm still fixing my gear from that grenade. And two: My sniper's inside the base."

Church: "Ok... So it won't be a problem cause I have an idea. Oh wait wait, does the blood have to be in your body?"

Zoom to Grif and Simmons firing their respective machine guns at the Blues.

Grif: "Simmmonns... I-I can'tt ffeeel my handdds." He said with his voice vibrating because of the rifle.

Simmons: "Maybe you should lay off the trigger, you dumbass." The kissass pointed out.

Zoom back to Church.

Church: Alright you, Doc, get over there and help Caboose!

DuFresne: My name isn't Doc, it's DuFresne.

Tex: "Yeah. None of us can't pronounce that, so from now on, your name is Doc."

DuFresne: I'm not really comfortable with that. I'm not a doctor, I'm a medic.

Tucker: What's the difference?

DuFresne: Well, a doctor cures people. A medic just makes them more comfortable.. while they die.

Tex/Ash: "You just had to ask Tucker."

Tucker: "Mental note: don't ever get shot."

Church: "It's settled then. Your name is now Doc."

DuFresne: "Alright, but I don't think it'll stick."

The background goes grayscale and DuFresne slides further to the foreground while DOC slides across behind him, with dramatic music playing.

Ash: "Oh, trust us, it'll stick." He reassured whole getting some nods.

Church: "Now get over to Caboose, and help him hold that position."

Doc: "I don't have a gun, I'm a pacifist."

Church: Well then just get over there and yell "bang bang bang".

Doc: "Eh, I don't know. Even that sounds pretty aggressive."

Ash: "Yeah well welcome to the army! Where we're ALL aggressive."

Doc: "Besides, I'm not supposed to get involved unless someone gets hurt."

Church: "Huh. I see." He gets an idea and a mischievous smirk.

Church turns toward Caboose and very deliberately raises his gun, then fires one shot.

Caboose: "Ahow! My foot..." he exclaimed in pain.

Ash: "Church!"

Church: Well, looks like Caboose has hurt himself. Maybe you should get over there and help him, Doc.

Doc: You know, you could have just asked nicely.

Doc goes over to Caboose and Church turns towards Ash and Tex.

Church: "...What? He killed me first. So we're even."

Ash: "I'm going to stab you swiftly in the throat tonight."

Church then gulped.

Zoom to the Reds.

Simmons: "Ah crap, I'm out. Give me some ammunition, Grif."

Grif: Me? I don't have any extra. I'm down to one bullet.

Simmons: Wha- How can that be? You're the one who carries all the extra rounds in to battle.

Grif: "Wait, since when?"

Simmons: "Since the last staff meeting."

Grif: We actually talk about stuff in those things? I just fall asleep inside my helmet.

Simmons: Well, you missed your job assignment, and now we have no ammo.

Grif: What's your job?

Simmons: Me? I'm the Social Chairman." He thumbed to himself.

Sarge: "Grif. Me and Treasurer Donut are empty. We need some clips." He said walking up to them.

Simmons: "Hey Grif, you remember that one bullet you have left? I thought of the perfect way you can use it."

Grif: "Of fuck you."

Zoom to Doc and Caboose.

Doc: "I'm here Caboose, where're you hit?"

Caboose: "Ah, ow, ow, ow, my foot, my foot!"

Doc: "The left foot?"

Caboose: "Ah, left. Let's see, that makes an L with this thumb and..."

Doc: "I'm just gonna assume it's the bleeding one."

Caboose: Yeah, the red one. Aeh. I can't believe Church shot me.

Church: "Oh don't even start, Caboose- OW!" He said with his exclaim echoing and heat smacked by Ash)

Doc: "Anything else?"

Caboose: "Uh, well wha?"

Doc: "You have a bullet wound in the foot. Is anything else wrong?"

Caboose: "Uh... Oh, I got one. Uh, well, sometimes when I fall asleep at night I think about my parents having sex, and I get really really mad for some reason." He said like it's no big deal. Though I think there's more going on there for Caboose's past.

Doc: "...Okay I'm just gonna start with the foot."

Caboose: "Okay."

Zoom to Tucker, Ash, Tex, and Church.

Tucker: Hey dude, why aren't the Reds firing?

Church: I don't know, maybe they're outta ammo.

Sarge: "Hey, Blues! We are giving you a chance to surrender!" The gruff leader yelled.

Church: "Surrender?"

Tex: "Yeah they're definitely out of ammo."