I never got an answer. She carried on, doing what she did -draining my energy, hugging, talking, complaining. I have forgotten to mention she often said she was dumb, or ugly. I gave up trying to help her. She told these things to me too. She called me a dumbass, jokingly of course, but it was too often. I started to hate it.
In response, I built walls. I won't let you hurt me, I thought. More and more often, I'd say no to her.
That's where we are now. Many other things happened, but I keep on rejecting her, her comments, her hugs, her. It feels wrong, somehow, but I need to protect myself. I told many of my friends and easier version of what I felt. They understood, fortunately.
The older soul, he understood too. I think he may have seen it before. We like to talk about the world, he mostly talks -he is a talker, I am a listener. I have been a listener for so long, maybe I have gotten used to it.
The lego houses resemble us, he hasn't built one yet, maybe that day is yet to come. We are no longer a group of three.
Even though I am not ready to take them apart, yet, I am trying to be myself. And I will.
YOU ARE READING
Under the moonlight
PoesiaPoems and thoughts. ...What else am I supposed to do? These are things I wrote down the way I think, with sweltering anger and invigorating joy, in tears and smiles. I dearly hope you will take these words as advice, to live by and never to forget. ...
