She's A Rainbow

10. that way, i get the best view

"Hey, Iris? Can I ask you a question?"

"Is it about leaving the melody in the accompaniment again?" I joke.

"Hehe. No. I was actually going to ask you about having a crush."

My fingers freeze, halting the sound from the piano.

"I know. It's a serious topic." He jokes.

To preserve my cool, I quickly relax my face and turn around; making sure not to get caught.

I clear my throat before asking, "Wh-What's your question?" The words nearly run from my mouth.

"What's it like for you? When you have a crush on someone?" He asks me.

I can feel my ears turning red. I fiddle with my hands to keep myself grounded.

"Um—" I start, focusing on the Grandfather clock ticking away behind him, instead of his face. "That's an intense question."

"Oh. It's okay if you don't want to answer-"

"NO! No. I'll gladly answer," I reply. "I guess...um...physically it feels like your entire body is heightened whenever you see them. Your pupils dilate. Every touch from them feels electric. It's like being on drugs. They're always living rent-free in your mind. There's different levels, though. If it's someone who you just met or if it's someone who you don't know, what I just described was the first reaction."

"What about when you do know them?"

"It's worse. Because at that point you're in a limbo zone. They call it a 'situationship'. And it takes so long to even pluck up the courage to say something because now that you know them you can realistically imagine a future with them and what could be, and then suddenly you realize you have a fifty-percent chance of it getting taken away—"

I can feel his gaze piercing through me.

"Iris," he starts. "I have to tell you something."

OH MY GOD. Oh my god. Oh my god is this happening—this is what I heard of in all of those videos!

"Uh— yeah?" I reply.

"Promise you won't tell anyone, yet? I think I want to break the situationship."

"What does that mean?"

"This girl's liked me for a really long time, and now I think I'm starting to like her."

OH MY GOD—-

He kneels to the floor to zip open his bag. "I'll show you a picture of her."

My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach. Oh my god. No. No...

"What?" I choke out.

"Here. I almost got it." He causally says while scrolling through his phone.

I look directly at him for the first time. "No. Don't show me."

"Why not?"

"What the fuck."

"What's wrong?"

"Why did you ask me that?" I question.

"Well, I wanted to get a girl's perspective to see how she feels about me."

"How do you even feel about her? How long have you known her?"

"Same time I met you. I think she's really pretty—"

"You're so cruel." I blurt out.

"What? Why am I cruel?"