I march on, silently, telling myself
I am stone, I am ice cold, I
am metal, unfeeling,
nothing can stop
me, nothing
can hurt
me.
I watch
all around
me as people
push and shove and
even, in my mind, die but the
question running through my head is
"What is wrong with me why am I this way what
is going on help me please oh help me I'm so scared"
Sometimes I just can't help what I'm thinking, and
it wants to come out so bad but I don't want
it out it should stay in it's dangerous
get back in no one wants you
stop I'm spinning out
of control so will
pull me
off.
Am I
going crazy
or is the world going
crazy? I look around and I
don't recognize anything anymore
all that's left in the world for me is pain
and heartache and suffering but silently so
no one but the wind can hear no one
to tease you or ask how you're
doing or to pretend to be
your friend only to use
you again and again
and again over
and over
never
end.
They
build a
cage around
you to try and keep
it in but sometimes it needs
out and when that happens there is
nothing you will do, nothing you can do but
give in for it is far easier to give in then fight but
it wants out so often because of the cage and it roars
and rages till you shake but nothing will ever
prepare you for that first feeling, the first
loss of control of feeling that there is
nothing you can do nothing
anyone else can do
but sit back and
watch, as it
goes away
free.
Released
into the world
nothing stopping it now
like a scream from a silent
person it has been building up
inside of me this scream but I can't
let it out no I can't they wouldn't understand
they would lock me up and throw away the keys and
drug me, pill me, make me into an obedient little zombie lamb
until all I know is a halfway world, half way between
living and dead and you might as well be
dead but they insist this is better
at least you are still alive
look at the sunshine
I don't want to
rather be
dead than
living
half
way.
