These Notes We Play (Ereri)

I Was Just A Toy (7)

Trigger warning!! This chapter will contain references to abuse, stabbing, torture and arson.
If any of these things trigger you please don't read.

Levi's POV:

"Are you okay Eren?" I ask concerned about the suddenly silent man on top of me.

"Yeah just thinking," he sighed out.

"Thinking about what?"

"I want to tell you what happened to me but I don't know how you'll take it... I'm scared you won't love me anymore," he trailed off as I felt his hands clutch my shirt.

I grabbed my phone turning off the music as he sat in front of me with a worried look on his face.

" Eren you don't have to if your scared, I will love you either way."

His eyes widened slightly and I saw him relax a little. I squeezed his hand reassuringly telling him I was there.

"Okay, but I need to tell someone it's eating away at me," he reluctantly replied.

"I'm here and I'm listening," I spoke softly to reassure him some more.

He looked like he was thinking hard about something before he took a deep breath.

"My dad did this to me..."

"Oh Eren, I'm so sorry," I replied shocked, angry and sad at what he said.

He sent me a small smile before his lips straightened and he spoke.

"We never had much money when I was little. My father was an discredited and unlicensed doctor, he lost it because he was caught performing unnecessary procedures on patients. My mum worked three jobs to keep us a afloat. She would be out almost all the time and I didn't see her very much but when I did she gave me her undivided attention. My father would spend almost all his time drinking and slobbing around the house whenever my mum was home, " he slightly quivered as he spoke.

I just sat and listened I knew that if I interrupted him now he would not be able to continue without crying.

" But whenever my mum would leave to go to work he would change and become horrible and violent towards. He would drag me down to the basement and lock me down there in the dark with all of his doctor equipment. That basement is the reason why I hate the dark and have to have some sort of light near me or I freak out. I was eight when that started and it only got worse as I got older, " he shook and I squeezed his hand lightly.

After calming down a little he carried on.

"That routine happened for three years; mum would go out to work; dad would take me into the basement; I would scream and cry for hours until I would give up out of exhaustion; he would come and get me before mum would come home and I would be silent until she came in. Seeing my mother everyday was the only thing keeping me sane and it was the only thing keeping me out of that basement during the night, then she got sick. She couldn't work and She only seemed to be getting worse, I was sure my father was poisoning her food but I couldn't do a thing. If I tried to help her by getting her some different food I would be thrown into the basement after a beating, " his eyes filled up with tears but he pushed them back. I wanted to hug him so badly but he needed me to just sit and listen so I did.

"She died on the thirty-first of March, the day after my birthday. I was destroyed by it and I only knew things would get worse for me."

He stopped and took a deep breath, " my dad's doctors license was somehow reinstated in the April after my mums death and he was working for a private company. We suddenly had a stable income and he didn't have to work so much and that's when the torture began, he locked me in the basement all the time and then he started coming in and watching me. He... He started beating and hurting me more than he had ever hurt me before. I was fourteen when I couldn't take his beatings anymore I wanted to escape or die I didn't care anymore I just wanted it to stop. So I tried to make him angry enough to actually kill me. He came down to the basement and started to tell me about a patient that he had just seen, I snapped and told him I didn't give a shit about his patients and that I hated him. "