These Notes We Play (Ereri)

The Crash (9)

Erens POV:

"I killed my boyfriend and his little sister in a car wreck three years ago..."

I looked to my lover shock and concern in my eyes as he looked like he was about to explode with fear as to what he was telling me.

I squeezed his hand, " oh god Levi I'm so sorry. "

He looked at me with tearful eyes.

"You don't need to be sorry it was my fault. Isabel introduced me to Farlan when we were in year eleven she was in year ten and I was tutoring her for her English exam. We got really close and were best friends she introduced Farlan to me when I came round for dinner one night and we hit it off. We were together within a couple months of meeting each other," he spoke with a slight quiver in his voice.

"It was our three years anniversary and we decided to go out for a meal with Issy. We had been drinking, I only drank a little because I knew I was driving us home. We left the restaurant, got in the car and started heading back to mine for drinks. I just..."

He stopped as his eyes welled up and he started shaking, I squeezed his hand again and he instantly calmed down at my touch.

"I just didn't see the car that was heading for us on the wrong side of the road. We crashed I don't remember exactly what happened because I blacked out. I woke up in the car and saw we were wrapped around the other. I looked around and saw Farlan with... With the engine in his chest, God there was so much blood. I tried to shake him but he... I... He... I killed him and it was all my fault... It was all my fault!" he shouted as he broke down into tears.

I pulled him into a hug and he sobbed into my chest clutching at my shirt.

"I'm so sorry Levi..." I whispered as I placed a kiss on his head. He sat back up his eyes bloodshot and cheeks red.

"Isabel was sat in the middle of the back I didn't know she hadn't put her seat belt on. I looked around the car for her and saw her on the smashed up bonnet of my car blood all over her she wasn't moving. I tried to get to her but my leg was pinned down by a piece of metal I couldn't move, my head started throbbing and I felt blood on my fingers I had cut my head open. I just sat there stuck and screamed.... I just screamed and screamed... I killed the only people I ever loved I took them away from everyone that loved them and it was my fault. If only I hadn't drunk anything that night I would have noticed it quicker." he started crying again and I could tell he was angry at himself.

"The other driver was fine, he was really drunk and had no idea what was happening. He was four times over the limit and shouldn't have been driving but he chose to and caused the crash." he sighed through his teeth.

"Levi this wasn't your fault it was his for drinking so much and thinking he could drive he killed Farlan and Isabel not you. You shouldn't blame yourself." I spoke my voice solid and calm in an attempt to calm him down before he did something he would regret.

"But I was the one who came out alive they had so much to live for they didn't deserve to die they were so good to me and I repay them like that."

"Levi they loved you and I'm sure they didn't  want you to blame yourself for their deaths," I spoke sternly squeezing his hand again.

"I know that but I can't help it they... They were the most important people to me they were my family," he sighed as his eyes welled up again.

"The paramedics had to get the rescue team to get me out of the car. I screamed at them the whole time to check on Issy and Farlan but I knew they wouldn't because they were dead I was their priority not them. It destroyed me I kept on screaming at them to help them all the way into the ambulance untils they knocked me out with some drugs..... I woke up in the hospital my leg in a cast and bandages all over me I didnt even realise how bad I was hurt because I was so focused on loosing them. "  He cried again gripping onto my shirt and shaking. I wrapped my arms around his back and pulled him closer to me.