𝙎𝙃𝙀 𝘽𝙀𝙇𝙊𝙉𝙂𝙎 𝙏𝙊 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙎𝙏𝘼𝙍𝙎, o. kenobi ✓

two

Eventually, she got up.

 She walked to Obi-Wan's door and knocked quietly. It swung open immediately and when he saw it was her, his posture relaxed.

 "Zara," he breathes.

 "Obi-Wan..."

 "Come in, please." He opens the door a bit wider and gestures for her to follow him in. And when she does, he shuts the door behind her.

 Suddenly, Zara Sidereus feels a bit claustrophobic...but in a good way, if that makes sense. Like the whole world is folding in on her, but it's okay because it's his hands that are crushing her.

 Those hands that have accidentally brushed against hers too many times to count. When that would happen, they'd both turn red and turn away.

 Standing in Obi-Wan's bedroom, they can both sense a shift in the Force, and yet, they still stay completely oblivious to each other's feelings.

 "Oh, you look ill..." Obi-Wan frowns, taking a few steps towards his friend. "What exactly happened on this mission?"

 "Obi-Wan, you know I can't tell you that," Zara breathes. "It must stay a secret to assure everything falls into place."

 He lifts a hand to feel her forehead and both are suddenly short of breath. The feeling of his knuckles brushing across her forehead nearly causing her knees to give out.

 Obi-Wan moves his hand from her forehead to her shoulder, and sets the other hand down too, squeezing slightly. He opens his mouth to speak, but Zara doesn't hear it. She's too focused on the way his hands grip her shoulders, the way he shakes her slightly as he speaks.

 "Okay?" he asks, snapping her back.

 "What?"

 "I said..." he chuckles, not even bothered by her zoning out, "once everything 'falls into place' you'll have to tell me everything that Master Titan put you through..." He whispers this last part, "Promise?"

 "Promise," Zara whispers back.

 Obi-Wan hesitates, but eventually takes his hands from her shoulders. The pair stand there for a few moments, soaking up the silence, unsure of what else to say.

 Finally, someone moves. Obi-Wan walks over to his bed and sits down, Zara follows. She sits down carefully, as if his bed would collapse under the weight of her so-called "unrequited feelings."

 Delicate hands run over the soft material of the blanket, and suddenly, she's imagining herself underneath it. Not in a dirty way, that would never be allowed.

 She imagines what it would be like to have his blanket wrapped around her, to have his smell fill her head and fog her consciousness like the drug that it is.

 And for the first time ever, Obi-Wan Kenobi notices how her head is filled with nothing but thoughts of him.

 And next to him, Zara still stays completely unaware of how long Obi-Wan had wanted to hold her like he did at the entrance. How long he had wanted to trace every detail of her with his fingertips.

 How long he wanted to kiss her...though he didn't know how.

 "Zara..." he murmurs.

 "What is it?" she looks up, and Obi-Wan's lost in those big brown eyes. There's that twinkle again.

 "Why didn't you tell me?" Oh, he had been so oblivious. He moves his hand closer to hers, just close enough for her to begin to understand what he was getting at.

 "You don't feel the same way," she explains softly. "I know you don't."

 "Oh, Zara," he bites his lip quickly, and fully places his hand over hers. "How could you say that. How could you spend nearly every waking second with me and say that."

 Using her free hand, she grips his robe tightly, pulling him the slightest bit closer to her. "You're such a good Jedi, of course you wouldn't feel the same way. You know...you know it's not allowed."

 He knew it wasn't, he reminded himself of that every single day. And yet, here he was.

 But she was right, a friendship that close wasn't allowed, it would turn them Dark. So he doesn't brush his lips against hers, doesn't slip his robes off due to the heat spreading through his body, instead, he hugs her again.

 Every hug they've had today is much different than the one before it; The first meant to fill the hole in Obi-Wan's heart that Zara left when she followed Master Titan on his mission; The second meant to fill the hole in Zara's heart that Obi-Wan left when he broke away from that first hug.

 And this one...cautious hands roaming over fragile bodies. Both shaking, in fear that someone will open the door and find them like this; So vulnerable and touch starved they could barely breathe.

 Oh, what would Qui-Gon say if he opened the door to this scene; His Padawan, arms wrapped tight around a girl, his mind wandering to nearly the end of the Galaxy.

 And what would Elio say? What would he do if he found his Padawan like this? With her hands, hungry for knowledge of the man holding her, those hands documenting every curve Obi-Wan Kenobi has to offer; Memorizing every bump, every breath, every single movement.

 The two felt so bad, holding each other this way, but that just made them want to hold each other even longer.

 But sitting here, they realized that what they were doing truly wasn't that wrong to someone passing by. It was just an innocent hug between two best friends, no one had to know about the longing for each other that had lasted years upon end.

 They sit on Obi-Wan's bed for what feels like years, both knowing that if they let go, they might never get a chance to be like this.

 They're not sure when the hug ends, but eventually it does. Because the next thing they know, they're at dinner, side by side deciding if they really need to block today's events from their memory.

 Obi-Wan's sure Zara's already forgotten all about it, but he can't seem to stop analyzing everything about those hugs for even just one second.