Spiderson and Iron dad one shots

Mother-Fucking-Nature

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Hi. I'm trying. forgive me.

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Dear gods its getting hard to update, do homework, sleep, and not kill myself because of the way my mental stability is shifting from "I'm happy and fine" to "I want to throw myself down the stairs."

21 year old Peter woke up to the bathroom door slamming shut in his flat. A frustrated voice came from inside. "I HATE MOTHER-FUCKING-NATURE!" Peter groaned and sat up. "MJ?" The same voice came from the bathroom again, but softer. "Sorry, Babe. I didn't mean to wake you, but someone decided to pay me an early visit." Peter looked over at his girlfriend's side of the bed. There was blood. Quite a lot of it, actually. (Story time. So I have this one friend who is iron deficient and the doctor told her that if she didn't get on this one type of birth control, she could die of blood loss. Yeah. Fun conversation, that one.) Peter winced for his girlfriend and yawned before getting up change the sheets.

"MJ? Are you okay in there?" Peter asked as he tucked the corners. It had been a while "Yeah...but I'm out of tampons. Can you run and-" Peter chuckled and said yes. "Need anything else?" A pause came. "Chocolate. Lots of it. And pickles to go with it." Peter's face contorted in disgust at his girlfriends request. "Uhhh...ew but, okay. Be back soon, Babe." A soft laugh and a 'thanks loser' was heard before Pete grabbed his keys, phone, and wallet before throwing on some jeans and leaving. 

The New York sidewalks were fairly empty, seeing as it was 5 in the morning and most people were either asleep or going back home to sleep. Peter walked to the 7 eleven on the corner. It was quite cold and Peter found himself without a jacket, so he sort of ran to get there quicker. After a bit of running, Peter was there. He stepped inside to go get the things he would need. A tried looking girl about 16 looked up from the counter and waved to acknowledge him. Peter waved back. Peter walked down the feminine product isle. A tall, creepy man was standing behind a nervous looking girl. Peter eyed the man and scowled as he moved his hand to touch the girl's thigh. 

"Get off me please." The girl whimpered, clearly uncomfortable. Peter stiffened. He turned to go and defend the girl, but was cut off by the creep's voice. "Aww, come on baby. I just wanna have a lil' fun." The girl pulled away and backed up. "No! I have a girlfriend and she-" "Oh, so your a fag. Well, my big, fat dick might convince you otherwi-" Peter pulled the girl away from the creep and stood infront of her. "She said no, asshole. Back off." The creep frowned and scowled. "And what are you going to do?" Peter decked the guy. "That." Peter then had the girl follow him to the front. "Em!" The counter worker looked up. "Kate? Babe, what's wrong?" 'Kate' hopped over the counter and hugged 'Em'. "Some sketchy ass guy tried to rape me." 'Em' stiffened. "A bitch done who-da-what-now?" Peter spoke up. "Uh, yeah, I kind of decked him in the back over there...call the police." 

'Em' nodded. "Uh, yeah. Thank you." 'Kate' Thanked Peter profusely as her girlfriend called 911. "If you don't mind me asking...what were you doing in the feminine product isle?" Peter chuckled. "My girlfriend asked me to get her some stuff." Kate nodded. "That's really sweet of you. And...I don't think Emily and I would mind paying for your stuff." Peter shook his head. No ma'am. I can't let you do that. Keeping that guy away from anyone else is good enough." Peter glanced back at the guy who was still unconscious and getting kicked by Emily. "-cking piece of shit! If that guy hadn't already knocked you out, I would have-" The  police then walked in. "Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to step away." Emily did as told and watched angrily as the guy was put in the ambulance. 

The police questioned Peter, Emily and Kate for 20 minutes before asking for the CCTV footage. "That man saved me." Kate said as she pointed at Peter. Peter blushed and looked away. He gripped his bag of goods for MJ. Suddenly, his phone rang. It was MJ. Oh shit. "Peter fucking Benjamin Parker! Where the hell are you?! I am dying over here!! Get your ass back here so I can love you!" Peter winced. "Okay, babe. Sorry. Police made me stay." Silence. "What?" "I kinda stopped a creep from raping someone?" MJ sighed. "Only you, Parker. Only you. Please get back home quickly, though. Please. I need my shit." "I'm on my way, love. Sorry again." "Don't apologize! You saved someone! Now come save me from mother-fucking-nature!"

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I am so sorry. It's so short and so bad.

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Plz kill me.