Where Did You Sleep Last Night? || Kurt Cobain

10. Anemic Royalty

"It's been like this ever since the surgery.." it was obvious Krist was nervous even mentioning it. Although June wasn't in the room currently, I guess we should get practice dancing around that word for awhile. "She's totally shut me out. She hardly gets out of bed, it's almsot impossible to get her to take a bath, and when I get her in the tub she'll just sit there and stare.. I'm really lost Hedi I don't know what to do."

"You want me to go play bad cop? Be the one to give her the push?" I asked him, taking my seat at the dining table, resting my chin on my hand for support.

"Whatever you feel is best. You two seem to have a special bond." Krist explained as he let out a frustrated sigh. "I'm so sorry for calling you I just..."

I cut him off. "June's my friend. I'll do whatever I can do to help her."

"June it's Hedi, can we talk?" My voice increased a register as I tried my best to come off as approachable. "June?"

"Go away Hedi I'm not in the mood." June groaned as she turned over, facing the wall instead of me. "Please leave."

"Why are you acting like this?" I closed the bedroom door and sat down next to her. "It's just me. Nobody else is here."

The stubborn blonde pushed herself back over to face me. She winced in pain and hung her head, letting out a whimper before a tear fell down her cheek. "Hedi could you please leave?"

"This ain't like you June." I observed as I watched the woman begin to cry. "It's me. You know you can trust me. We're all really worried about you."

"Fine." She struggled to sit up, letting out one more scream in pain before she was successful. "You want the truth?"

I nodded honestly. "Yes!"

"I'm not okay. I lost a baby that I had already had visions about raising. I lost a peice of my body that helps me create human life. My child died. I definitely lost a child."

"I know June.. and I am so so sorry..."

"And Krist is afraid to touch me. He's afraid of hurting me." She shook her head in disbelief before burying her face in her knees and letting out another loud sob. "God I'm a fucking mess!"

"Oh June..." I gave her a sympathetic look, carefully throwing my arms around her. "Krist wants to help you June. You need to be honest about what you're feeling..."

I'm one to talk since I'm Mrs "ignore your feelings for Kurt Cobain and maybe they'll go away"

"I'm scared of my own reproductive system Hedi. I'm scared of getting pregnant again since it might turn out like the last one did."

"It's gonna get better with time June. How you're feeling now isn't neaccisrly gonna be how you'll feel later. Just talk to Krist. He loves you so much and it's killing him to see you hurting like this when you shut him out."

June let out a heavy sigh, wishing she could beileve the only advice I was able to give. Flipping her hair away from her tear soaked cheeks, she changed the subject. "Have you talked to Erin lately?"

I swallowed hard at the mention of my sister. "I talked to her last night. June c'mon..."

"Talking about it makes it worse..." she told me, staring at the ceiling as she took a pause. Letting out a lengthy exhale, she pressed a cigerette to her lips. "I haven't smoked one in... almost a month."

"That's it. June you're getting out of this house right now." I raised my voice as I grabbed her wrist.

"Just leave me alone Hedi." She whispered quietly as she began to resist my grip. "Please just leave."