Starlight | completed

Chapter 32 | confessions

❝He shone like the stars, he was the brightest person I knew.❞

Chapter 32 | confessions

Sneaking in through the window, the breath of nature surrounds him. He looks away from Aera towards the sky, it has always been his grounding point. The sky shows no mercy, no fairness. Some days it is dark, and angry as it spits rain, hail or even snow down below. Other days the sky is calm, filled with light, it is serene and peaceful.

Some people are drawn towards the former, and some towards the latter.

He wonders what Aera is drawn towards because it is definitely not him. "I'm sorry" she says again, her hand lightly comes to rest on his chest, formed into a fist and she frowns. "I can't tell you that I love you, and I can't tell you I don't. I don't know, what it is that I feel" she said, her brows pinching together as she stares at Luce.

"Maybe you just don't love me. You did choose to leave me in the end" he mumbled, done caring about holding in his thoughts. At this point, there isn't really anything holding him back. Aera deeply frowns at that, lines of worry evident in her expression. She reaches forward, and wraps her hand around Luce. Her touch is barley there, it's faint and faded. But Luce clings to it.

As if it's the last time.

"I-I have to confess something" she said soflty, her voice sounding pained. "Is it about Will?" Luce suddenly asked, trying to ignore the drop of jealousy that was prominent in his voice. Aera looked up at him, surprise visible on her face. She shook her head quickly, "We're just friends now." she said.

Friends can break your heart.

Luce swallowed soflty, and nodded. Flashing her a encouraging smile, he sank himself onto the seat next to her. "Then what is it that you want to say?" he asked, and there it was again. That pained grimace, she looked as Luce did when he felt as if he was burning or drowning. She looked utterly devastated.

She looked as Luce did when he would watch Aera, all alone, as he watched her watch Will. As if Will was the only person she ever saw, as if the he was the only thing she ever saw. How was it she never noticed? When he had that expression on his face? How did she never notice that she was slowly killing him?

Because at this moment Aera looked as if something was killing her, and Luce could recognize that expression easily. It came with lonely nights, and faded skies. "What is it?" he asked softly, she looked like she needed a reason to continue speaking. Someone to believe in, a meaning, it's a bittersweet feeling to know that he most likely won't be that person. That meaning.

He wishes he could be, he wishes that he was there with her forever. But like her, he is unsure of what she will say. "You know how I wanted to be popular?" she asked soflty. And Luce soflty nodded, how could he ever forget? It was what made the sky fall and covered in blue. "Yeah" he said, waiting for her to continue on with her words.

"I-I never actually wanted it" she whispered, and Luce raised a eyebrow, not quite understanding. Aera seemed to realize she wasn't making much sense either, she wrapped her arms around herself. She looked as if she was trying to hold her herself together, she looked as if she was going to break any moment.

"M-My dad, he wanted m-me to have the same high school experience a-as him. And when he was ali-alive, I always told him I was happier with just you. Nothing meant anything to me without you, but he had always thought it'd be happier if my life was similar to his." She suddenly sniffled, and reached up to wipe at her eyes. Her mascara turning darker and more like a liquid, with the tears.

Luce reached forward and wiped her tears, she flashed him a soft smile. "He was so so happy, you know? He shone like the stars, he was the brightest person I knew. A-And it was his birthday a f-few months ago. I just t-thought that I could—"she broke off suddenly, burying her face into her arms.Luce continued her line of thoughts, "You thought you could be what he wanted," he finished softly for her.

Aera didn't look up at him, she brought her knees up to her chest and buried her head into her knees. "What else was I supposed to get him? A watch? He's dead, I don't think that's possible. How can he be dead? It makes no sense, he was the most alive person I knew. He lived, he breathed, he was laughing next to me one second, and then the next he was gone." she angrily muttered, sobbing softly.

She pulled her head off her knees, and stared at Luce, angry traitorous tears sliding down her cheeks. She furiously swiped at them, looking every bit her fiery self as she used too. She looked as if she was angry at the whole damn universe. "Why didn't you just tell me?" Luce softly asked, and she laughed bitterly.

"Don't you know yourself Luce? You would have convinced me to never do such a thing." she muttered, and Luce almost objected. But then he stopped, because he would have. He would have told Aera that she didn't need to pretend to be someone else, her dad wouldn't have wanted that.

And he would have convinced Aera, because he always convinced her. He knew what to say.

"Well, you were a damn good actress" he mumbled, and Aera laughed. Her laugh sounding more forced and pained, than anything else. But it was a start, she swiped at her cheeks again and smiled at Luce. "Drama class from last year definitely helped" she said, a halfhearted smiled on her face.

Luce grinned.

She grinned back at last.

Then her face was back to being grim once again, she reached forward and grabbed onto Luce's hands. "Nothing was worth losing you Luce" she mumbled, and Luce reached forward and wrapped his arms around her. She smiled into the crook of his elbow, a soft and sweet smile.

"No importa que now separe la distancia, siempre habrá un mismo cielo que nos una." he muttered into her head, and she giggled soflty into the crook of his neck. "At least tell me what that means" she asked, and Luce smiled softly.

"It means that it doesn't matter that we're separated by distance, there will always be the same sky to unite us" he whispered back, and Aera smiled soflty to herself. "Where'd you come up with something like that?" she muttered to herself.

At that Luce smiled sheepishly, "I think I saw it on google" he mumbled, at that Aera swatted at him. An expression of genuine joy on her face once again, "Doofus" she mumbled, and Luce only just chuckled. She smiled back, "At least you sound nice when you speak Spanish" she continued absentmindedly, as Luce flushed a bright pink beside her.

She turned back to him, a different expression overcoming her face. Luce waited for her next words, maybe she had decided if she finally loved him. He didn't know, but the expression she held was a serious one.

"I've made up my mind"

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love or no love is the real questions here👊