number 96 :: lrh

dont give up

That boy,
I had only known him for a few days but he took me in, made me laugh, and threw me out. It hurt me to say it, I fell for him. It was pathetic, I know, but I couldn't help it. When he called me that damn nickname,
Princess,
it made my heart flutter more than it had ever before. Whenever he hugged me it made me feel like I had a safe haven. When he let me wear that stupid jersey with his stupid name on it, it made my heart warm. When he kissed me it made me feel the fireworks that only happen in fairy tales burst in my stomach.
But he took all of that from me and smashed in on the ground into a million pieces along with my heart. He took away my happiness for his own selfish self and made me feel like nothing.
I literally felt like nothing, I felt useless. Like the life was sucked from my soul and given to him so he could execute it. It felt like hell on Earth.
I had been sad before, yes, but not this sad. This was the worst kind of sad, heartbroken. Yeah I am aware that I sound pathetic for crying over a boy that was never mine but I couldn't help it. I guess you could say that it was my five minuets of fame with Luke fucking Hemmings.
As much as I hated to say it: I was heartbroken, pathetic, lifeless and broken.
I knew that if I confronted him that he wouldn't care, I mean he told me never to talk to him again but even if you think im crazy for it, I won't give up on trying.
Today I got out of bed for the first time in a week, got dressed and left. I knew the way as if it was the light at the end of the tunnel-which in my case it was. I've never been so nervous to do anything in my life, it had to be done though; he had to know.
I waited this off so much until I gathered up the courage to knock on the door. This was it. This is it.
Four minuets and forty seven seconds, I waited at his door.
The door slowly creaked open and reveled my heartbreaker. He stood slightly slumped over and his face was red, eyes the same. It actually hurt me to see him so vulnerable. His cheeks were stained with dried tears. His face dropped even more, as if possible as he looked at me deeply.
Without a word he pulled me into his house.
"Princess, you're back," He whispered, "I didn't think you would ever come back, I didn't mean a word I said that day."
I looked down at my feet for a distraction and instead up lifting up my chin, he kneeled down in front of me and hugged my legs, kissing my shirt that covered the surface of my belly. He put his ear to my stomach and pulled me closer by my legs.
"I still care about you, I was just mad. I was stupid to say anything like that to you and I wish I could take it back. But I can't and Im sorry for that, Princess," He mumbled.
I reached down to lace my fingers in his hair and massage it. He sighed in relief at my small gesture. I reached down even further to tug at him shirt, motioning for him to stand up and he did just that. I let him stand there for a second before I pulled him into a hug, a bone-crushing hug.
He held onto me so tightly that I swear he would never let me go. Until he let me go, that is.
"Luke, everything that you said that day hurt me. It killed me to stand there and hear every word that you said. It was so painful to accept that you didn't want me to talk to you ever again, or even think about you. But I kept thinking about you, you were the only thing on my mind since I left your house that day. I've cried so much in this past week and Im not proud of it. It killed me to lay in bed every second if the day and think about everything that we did in the short time we knew each other. I hurt me to admit to myself that I fell for you but I did it. I knew I wasn't lying to myself. I knew that I fell for you and you threw me out to the curb. Everything hurt me but I picked myself up and brought myself here to tell you all of this. And most of all I came here to tell you that I fell for you and I love you. I really do," I ranted everything. He listened with so much emotion in his eyes.
"I love you so much," I whispered.
"I can't deny it either, I fell for you, Alyssa. I love you too, so, so, so, so much Princess," He whispered back and kissed me with such passion that I could explode.
"Never leave me ever again. Hold onto me, no matter how much I try to push you away, keep me with you, don't let me leave. Ever," He said seriously.
"I promise."
"And I promise you."