Keeping the Bad Boy

Chapter 36

Courtney doesn't want to go home, so I just take her to my special place because I don't want to go home to an empty house. As I drive further into the woods, the trees get thicker, cutting off much of the setting sun. The sun is almost completely set and we're only half way there. Courtney ever once asked where we were going. As the moon grew brighter in the sky, I felt Courtney's grip on my waist slowly begin to looser and looser. I sped up a little and I felt her scoot closer to me on the seat, squeezing my hips with her legs. I glance over my shoulder and see her with her arms held high over her head. Her head was tilted back, her sandy hair blowing in the wind, the moonlight shining off of it like it would on the sand in sunny California. I heard her shout out in joy over the purr of the engine. She had to scream pretty loud to overpower this thing when I'm driving this fast. I feel her hands close on my shoulders and her legs draw up behind me. I feel her knees in my back and her hand on the top of my head as she stands up and gains her balance. Only once have I ever tried to drive a motorcycle with one hand, and I crashed. I remember my mistake though, so I took the chance again. I lifted my left hand into the air and I felt her tiny one close around two of my fingers. She sat back down and I drifted to a stop right by the now frozen pond. I killed the engine and I heard her gasp at the moonlight shimmering off the frozen waters. She climbs off the bike and wanders to the water like a fascinated child. I watch her with my hands in my pockets, admiring the way she moved. Graceful, like a ballerina and yet clumsy like a baby learning to walk. She sat down in the dirt and looked at me over her shoulder. She patted the spot beside her. I walked over and sat down beside her and put an arm around her tiny body. "It's beautiful, Sam," she whispers, her head on my chest. She stands up and extends a hand to pull me up. I take it, but don't pull. I knew if she actually tried to help me up she would fall down. She walks to the edge of the water and steps out on the ice. "Woah, be careful. It doesn't freeze but a couple of inches, Courtney," I say, quickly extending my hand to catch her. She walks farther towards the middle and my heart sinks as I hear the ice begin to split. "Courtney!" I yell at the same time that she yells, "Sam!" Multiple, large cracks slither out from where she stands. I take a couple steps onto the ice and extend my arms. "Come to me, you'll be okay," I say and see so many emotions flash in her eyes. She trusts me, but something is telling her to stay where she is. A primal instinct that tells you not to move in a situation like this. She takes a slow, shaky step towards me and the crack in the ice deepens. She cries out and my heart thumps against my ribs. I know good and well the ice can't hold my weight, but I step out further anyway. I get closer and closer to her, but I hear the crack before I feel the pain. I was almost to her. A mere yard away when the ice gave way, sending me plummeting into the depths of the freezing pond. At first, I can't move. When I open my eyes, I see darkness. I swim hard to get to the surface, but am greeted with a thick layer of ice when I get there. I bang on it with my fists as I slowly run out of air. My head feels like it is about to explode and my lungs feel shriveled. I search for the hole I fell through, but can't find it. I hear someone call my name. I recognize the voice, but I don't remember her name. I see an arm come down through an opening in the ice feet from where I am and see the tips of her hair floating on the cold water. I swim toward her, but she only seems to get farther away. I feel myself sink. Feel the darkness take me once and for all. I take a deep breath, filling my lungs with water. I reach for the arm. But there is nothing to reach for. I drift and drift . . . and drift . . . farther and farther away. The cold no longer hurts. The moon is distorted through the ice and I feel myself sinking lower and lower.

I fall into complete darkness. When I open my eyes, I see my mother sitting at her piano, her long fingers stretching across the keys. I see Ryder and myself come and sit on the floor behind her and watch her. A deep bellowing noise comes from somewhere and the smiles fall from our faces. A tall, broad man with black hair comes into the room and grabs the little woman by her arm and yanks her to her feet. He glances down at us and throws her against the piano. She knew it would just make it worse for her to try to fight, but she also knew that she didn't want us to grow up not putting up a fight. She shouts for us to run as she kicks him in his crotch. He doubles over and we try to run out the door but he grabs Ryder by the back of his shirt. His fingers brush my arm as I run out the door. I turn around and see Ryder reaching for me. Begging for help. Help that I can't give. He picks Ryder up and throws him. He literally threw him into the wall. He cried out and my mother ran to him as I stand in the hall in shock. I never once cried. Crying was a sign of weakness that I refused to show towards my father. His green eyes locked on mine. I knew my mother wondered why I never cried, but she never asked. My father took a step toward me, but I didn't move. I stood my ground, even though I was only four. He chuckled and smirked at me. "You must have been brave in a past life my little soldier. Either brave or incredibly stupid." I wish I could say differently, but my father knew me better than anyone because we were exactly the same. He would've stood his ground and been calm until the time came for him to fight, then he would act. He put his hands under my arms and raised me high above the ground. Quickly, I swing my legs back and then swing them forward, coming in contact with his jaw. He drops me but kneels down, preventing me from going anywhere. "You're quite a fighter, aren't you? You're clever, you're brave. You'll never fit with them," he said, nodding toward my mother and brother, who were both staring at me. "You belong with me because we are the same, you and me. We always will be, no matter how much you end up hating me. Just remember that."