Fragile Tension (Alan Wilder x Martin Gore)

11: The Willpower

Each moment felt like a mirage. Like the lives of others were being reflected onto theirs. Like these weren't the lives they were leading.

Late into the night, whilst his three bandmates dreamt, Alan lied awake as his body tried to process it all. All of which fogged up his mind and weighted his breathing.

As he wrapped his arm around his sleeping partner, his mind became like that of a broken cassette tape, repeating the same word countless times.

Father.
~~~~~
"Morning!"

"So... early... Dave..." Andy dragged himself out of bed, putting his glasses on.

"Yeah, but today's important!" Dave responded, opening the curtains.

"Everyday's important to you, mate." He shot back, his eyes sensitive to the sunlight.

Expecting to see his two bandmates in the bed next to theirs, he turned around.

But they weren't.

"Wait, where're the other two?"

"That's what I was about to tell you," Dave had a small snap to his voice. "They've gone to the clinic for Mart's first sonogram."

"Oh, cool." Andy nodded as he looked in the mirror, but quickly became confused. "What's a sonogram?"

"I think it's when they take a picture of the baby on the screen or something along those lines - I'm not quite sure myself." Dave chuckled.

"Makes slightly more sense now..." Andy smiled before yawning. "Why are we up if it's only Al and Mart who need to be?"

"Because, Fletcher, when we were touring for Some Great Reward we were lazy fuckers, and I don't want that this time. This is our fifth tour - aren't we used to the odd lack of sleep?"

"I'm certainly not. And what about Martin?" His bandmate tilted his head as he argued.

"Martin's the exception because he needs to get plenty of rest for the baby's sake; as far as I'm aware, you're not pregnant, so you don't need to sleep for centuries at a time!"

"Well, now I kinda wish I was pregnant!"

"I'd think twice about that..."

"Hm, yeah, I take that back..."
~~~~~
"So lie down on here for me," The nurse instructed Martin as the tapped the sheet that lined the examination bed, and he carefully did so. "That's great, thank you."

Clinging onto his hand, Alan sat on a chair just beside the bed his partner lied on.

"Hey, I love you." He whispered as the nurse set the machine up, feeling the faint shakiness in Martin's hold.

"I love you too." Martin turned his head and giggled.

"Okay! I think we're about ready." The nurse said with a delighted tone before explaining what would take place to the couple.

"I'm just gonna ask you to ride your shirt up." She continued.

Martin followed her instructions once again, exposing his stomach.

"Alright; what I'm now going to do is put gel on your tummy...  It will feel a little cold, but the feeling shouldn't last too long!" She warned him with a chuckle.

"I'm ready!" Martin chuckled back, adjusting his rolled up shirt and tightening his hold on Alan's hand in slight nerves.

"You're alright, baby." Alan noticed the antsy squeeze his partner gave.

The gel coming into contact with his lower stomach, goosebumps immediately formed on his skin.

"Ooh, God, you were right!"