Death Formula | KTH ✓

20. And When the truth Unveils

That day after the funeral, it was dusky and bucketing down with rain when soaked to the skin, I kneeled in front of my parents' grave. I had thought that the season was over and that spring was soon going to come but the downpour told me that monsoon was giving its farewell before it would leave with all grandeur.

Water tipped over my head like pebbles, impact so harsh though I cared less. My body was entirely numb as though the relentless rain had washed away all the emotions from within me, leaving me terrifyingly numb.

"Dad," I muttered, gazing at the stony grave of my dad and then looking beside it at the freshly dug bed of my mother. "Mum's here, beside you."

My lips quivered but I cracked a tiny smile. "Foolish I was to not cherish her presence...to not take care of her. I had been busy mourning over you, dad...over Aera that I forgot, I had one person still with me. I'm sorry mum for hating you. I guess... I guess it has been said rightly that when you lose something that's when you realize its importance. I...I can't believe I'm an orphan.... can't believe that I have no one with me."

Tears trickled down, mixing with the rainwater. I hung my head low, my shoulders shrank and my knees dug into the muddy ground beneath me.

"I'm sorry, mum. I'm sorry, dad. I'm sorry for being such a selfish daughter. I'm sorry, dad for not taking care of mum. Please forgive me."

I felt the presence of a warm hand over my shaking shoulders and the pebbles had stopped its assault all so suddenly.

Taehyung.

My sullen eyes and crestfallen face gradually perked up, hoping for him to be here with me in this unwanted catastrophe.

But I was wrong. It was Jimin.

Holding a black umbrella over both of our heads, a genuine crease of worry forming over his forehead, he stood there, gazing down at me.

To see someone I was acquainted with at a disastrous time was all I needed to get back on my frail feelers and flung my arm open to clasp it around Jimin, digging my head into his chest as I cried and cried and cried.

I felt his one arm over the small of my back, rubbing soothing circles. "Hey...Soa, I'm here with you. It's okay. It's okay."

"J-Jimin...she left me alone... alone in this world..." I wailed, unable to look up at him.

"I am here for you." He pulled back to glance at my ugly face, resting his palm on my cheeks as he erased the tears. "You're not alone. You have me. Your parents-"

Parents.

"Parents...the reason behind every child's existence,... the reason behind the beating heart in their... chests but alas,... how petty... of the children who would regard their parents with... with hatred... how petty of me." I choked.

"Hey, listen up. I don't know why you hated them but one thing you need to understand, Soa that realizing the fact that you hated is enough to set you free from grudge and get you back into the process of loving whether it's after their death or not. We all do go through this phase of our life when we hate our parents but as and when we grow mature, we see and understand their point of view. So for you, now is not the time to feel dejected over your regrets instead it is the time for you to accept it and spread love. Love them, I'm sure that's all they want from you."

Jimin's words poured down a soothing feeling into my heart, a feeling that I always felt when Taehyung would speak. Taehyung. Where was he? Why did he not come? Did he know about my mother?

I looked down at the puddle where my feet was soaked in. Taehyung's absence had always haunted me. I needed to see him. "If only you were here Taehyung," I murmured.

"Taehyung?" Jimin quirked a brow. "You mean Kim Taehyung?"

My eyes lit with hope. "You know him? Where is he? Why hasn't he come to the funeral?"

Jimin shifted uneasily, a wan look in his eyes. "Soa, it's been two years since his death."

And the ground beneath me got swept away.