The 3G Life

September 10 Monday 2018

I do something crazy today and moreover, I do not regret it. Yeah, it may be that I should have been hurt by the result but I know what I do is right. Moreover, it is the only thing to do and the truth will have come out sooner or later. So better sooner.

"You should go and tell him how you feel," says Zara.

"What if he says no?" I ask anxiously.

"Then you would know, he is not worth it."

"Or maybe. I am not worth him."

"No Amber, you actually deserve a prince."

So I am excited and extremely nervous through the whole class. But I make up my mind that it is either DO OR DIE. And I choose to DO it. I know this is the second time I am going to confess to a guy. The first time is my worst experience so I already know how it will feel to be rejected.

But what if this time he says yes? A fairytale will happen. 3G has taken him away from me and 3G will give him back to me. But I have a feeling it will not go well. But I pray to God that may the best thing happen to me. He has to do a miracle.

I somehow finish class and stand just outside Mohammed sir's class. Why is he being so late? I grow restless and pace back and forth. Zara asks me to be patient but what does she know about confessions? She has never confessed to anyone in her entire life.

"Boys are not as complex as you think," consoles Zara.

"You don't know Aadil, he is not just any boys," I reply.

"He can never reject a girl like you."

"He easily can. I am nothing compared to him."

"Of course not. You are 100 times better than him."

Am I going to lose my dignity if I do this? Come on, I shall be better than this. Maybe I shall wait and he will come to me himself. But I know Aadil, he will rather perform suicide than even come to me. I have to be the one to go down on my knees.

I try to recall whatever I am going to say to him but I know I will forget all my lines after I see him. But still a little preparation always pays off. I will tell him about the little memories we share and how I feel about him after he leaves.

Finally he comes. Okay, Aadil has come. Why has he come? I am half praying that he remains absent today and I do not have to see him for the next two weeks because exam is coming up. But I knw it is an indication of God that I should go ahead.

He goes inside the room and I ask Zara to call him for me. She goes triumphantly and brings him back. Many of my classmates see that something is happening. I am sure my suspicion gives away everything. I ask him to come downstairs with me and take him to a quiet corner.

"I have something important to tell you," I say in a shaking voice.

"Go ahead, I am listening," replies Aadil.

"I don't know how to say this."

"Okay, then how would I know?"

"Everything has changed since you left."

He remains silent and I see something in his eyes. Is it fear? Is he worried about something? Is he afraid that he cannot say yes? Come on Aadil, it takes me all my courage to tell you this. Please do not ruin this moment. At least say yes.

"Since you have left, I am feeling frustrated."

"Why Amber? What have I done?"

"I don't know Aadil, but everything seems incomplete."

"What is left incomplete Amber?"

"Our arguments, your music, your pushups."

"You know that you are talking crazy."

"Because I have gone crazy."

"Maybe I should go upstairs now."

"Not before you give me an answer."

"Maybe after our o levels. Not now."

"I can't wait, I need an answer now."

"Not without an explanation, Amber."

"Just say yes or no."

"I think the answer is no for now."

"Okay, I guess that ends it."

I am completely broken. But I know better than to show it. I take a step back, turn around and I walk out of the gates with my head held high. I pretend that nothing has happened between us and it is just an MCQ session with some answers.

I walk across the street and everything blurs out with my tears. I silently cry all along the way of the footpath. I even stand for a while because I cannot see my way with my tears. I wipe them away but they rush back even more than before and I cannot control it.

I stop at the end of the pave way and look back at the 3G building. I should have never come here. Girls like Zara and Saeed should. They are always so happy. Zara does not say no so why do Aadil? How dare 3G take Aadil away from me?