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1 month later
1st person
Y/n
Shy. It was shy young love again. We were stepping on toes, because we had forgotten how to dance. I mean, how does one dance with three people? Part of me was staying strictly loyal to Remus, because I've only ever dated one person. Sirius must have forgotten how to flirt. His face would go beet red whenever I'd bump shoulders with him, as I swung hands with Remus.
We talked it out. We established boundaries, and explained everything. The cheating hurt, and there was no denying that it was cheating. If I wanted, Remus would worship the ground I walked on, Sirius would of course do the same. But it was cold. I felt cold. I couldn't bring myself to just let it go, and indulge in the unconditional love that they wanted to give me. There was still a spark of anger, hurt, and resentment. How could I just let it go? What if they did it again?
"Why are you just staring at the same page?" Remus suddenly asked. Ripping me away from my transfiguration book.
"I dunno, just stuck I guess." I sighed and flopped back against his bed. Sirius was using Remus' thigh as a pillow.
"On what, my love? Is there something bothering you? We can talk. I don't want you to harbor your feelings." Remus looked down at me, his brunette hair falling into his eyes.
I tried to think about how I was going to word what I was going to say a bit better.
"Since... would- I- Would you do it again?" I spit out. Remus looked at me confused and Sirius sat up.
"What's that?" Remus asked softly.
"Since, I mean. Since you loved, Sirius. What if... what if you found another person. Would you do it again?" I felt my lip quiver. Remus brought a soft hand to my face and brushed along my cheekbone with his thumb.
"No. No, I would never do it again. The three of us. It's forever. I will be here for you forever. I'll be here for Sirius, and he'll be here for you. I admit, the guilt of how I worked this out eats me up everyday. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I need both of you, and no one else." Remus whispered to me. Voice filled with adoration and I grasped his wrist that was on my face and let a stray tear fall down.
"M'sorry, I love you Rem, and you too Sirius." I sniffled, and felt Sirius rub my calf.
"I actually wanted to talk to you two." Remus said.
"What about, Moony?" Sirius asked.
"It was a bit ago, we were falling asleep. You both said something about... your home lives, and I was just wondering why you never told me." Remus looked away for a moment.
"I never wanted you to worry. I love you too much to subject you to the abuse I've gone through." Sirius admitted. "It's nothing I haven't ever been able to handle."
"You don't have to handle it by yourself. Ever. I'm both of your guys' partners in life. I want to be here."
