and if I would ever publish when I'm down, this book would be endless like the deep dark hole wich is growing in my soul. like the rivers of tears running down my face, making my eyes red and my heart ache. but lately there's not even a reason just me all this shit up in my head with keeps on fucking up all my thoughts. telling me lies and changing the truth, manipulate myself, that's what it does.
And if I would ever publish when I feel like I can't, just wanna end it all and finally give up my, this book would already have countless chapters. 'Cause this shit is getting worst, it started out of nowhere and now I just wanna run away into a better life, find happiness and some sunshine. Something to bright up the dark wich lives in my mind and making me smile all the time. Somewhere I'm loved and feeling alright, knowing my worth. Where I'll be alright. But there isn't a way out of this mess, the doctor said just wait some more and we'll see if you're messed up enough to get the help. Just let me struggle a little bit more, but if it continues I can't promise to stay around any more.
'Cause it isn't here since today, it's been fucking my mind for a few years. But I know I'm to close to my worst, so I keep on trying not to burst out into tears every damn second of this endless looking mess of life.
so just let me go, dive in to the sea.
'Cause death would look way prettier on me.
YOU ARE READING
only the brave | poems
Poesía« it's a church of burnt romances and I'm too far gone to pray. It's a solo song and it's only for the brave » some poems I had in mind, some are personal, some just fictional. I just let my hands write whatever floads in my mind. TW // mostly depre...
