The Shadow of Our Past

Intertwined

Jess and Ethan emerge out of the brush, greeting us with bright smiles. Ethan sets their blue beach bag in the small pile next to mine and Ben's. We stand up in unison, Jess hugging me and Ethan firmly shaking Ben's hand.

"So, what happened while we were away?" Jess inquires suggestively while the boys chat amongst themselves. She raises an eyebrow as I let out a groan, catching a glance from Ben. He looks away respectfully when he sees my predicament and returns to his conversation with Ethan.

"Nothing." Jess crosses her arms, giving me an unconvinced look. "I swear!" Her stoic façade breaks and she laughs, patting me on the shoulder.

"I know. You're not one to jump into things quickly. I'm giving you shit." I let out a fake agitated sigh. Jess and I let the men continue talking while we gather a few twigs and branches for a small fire. I smile as I watch the two, admiring Ben from afar. He smiles, looking down at the sand and scratching the back of his head. He's never told me about any other company outside of his brothers, so I think Ethan might be his only real friend. When we have a small bundle of wood gathered, we return to the makeshift fire pit and begin to drop the branches onto the sand. I kneel down, arranging the twigs and paper we brought methodically. After numerous attempts at lighting the stubborn paper I stuffed under a branch, I let out an indignant huff.

"Having trouble?" Ben muses from behind me, causing me to nearly shoot up from my crouched down position in the sand. When I look back at him guilt is swimming within his brown eyes.

"Sorry."

"It's alright," I soothe. "Things like that aren't your fault at all. That's a problem I've had for the longest time, I'm just overly skittish." His posture straightens slightly and he meets my eyes again.

After whispering a slightly less refrained "okay" he joins me in the sand. When he speaks again, his voice is back to his normal, deep tone. "Do you need my help?" he offers, not unkindly. I nod, shyly handing him the match box. He strikes a match against the side of the small box and delicately uses it to light the paper I placed under a few branches. He uses a sturdy piece of cardboard to fan the flames gently. The bundle of paper burns slowly, then it's rapidly engulfed in dancing oranges and yellows. Ben sits back, looking proud of his burning accomplishment as the wood slowly begins to catch fire.

We both scoot away from the open flame, Ben resting his back on one of the large rocks that Ethan had set up as a makeshift backrest when we first found the beach. I put my arms behind me, dispersing my weight onto my hands. We sit like this for a moment and enjoy the pleasant heat of the fire as the sky begins to darken above us.

"Hey!" Jess calls from the shoreline, "are you gonna join us or not?" She puts a hand on her hip, flicking her long, black hair behind her back with her other hand. By the time Ben had started the fire, she and Ethan had discarded their over-shirts and now are left in their swimming suits. I wasn't sure if Ben had thought of changing into any swimwear, but I had changed into mine before leaving in case we wanted to swim.

A sudden wave of self consciousness fills every pore in my body. When I look at Ben, I see the same feeling adorning his features. His worried expression only reinforces the fear that his wounds from weeks before have yet to heal.

I'm the first to speak between the two of us. "I think we might just stay in the shallows for now." Ben nods in agreement, his gaze conveying his thankfulness without the need for words.

Jess shrugs as Ethan wraps a loving arm around her shoulder. "Suit yourselves!" she calls out as they walk into the ocean together. Ben is the first to stand and I'm suddenly dwarfed as he towers over me. He offers a hand to me that I take gratefully. The contact makes me shiver as he pulls me up, his hand lingering a second longer than needed when I am on my feet.