Some AMBW mini stories/ Reactions , including Kpop idols and artists.
There are not a lot of AMBW and that bothers me as a Black Kpop stan .
If you feel the same , why don't you take a look a my book ? :)
Stories can include :
ROMANCE
SMUT
JEALOU...
I know what you are thinking : Im a hoe or whatever thing you want to describe me . Saying I’m sorry will erase anything ? Saying I did not mean it , will change something ? No. Because I’m not sorry to you. I’m sorry to myself. I fell in love with someone taken. And I’m full aware of that. Being the hidden woman is hard too. I have feelings too. I’m an human too. The more we talked , the more I was falling hard . I noticed every details about him. I know every beauty marks he has. I know that when he is happy , his smile goes from side to side . He squints his eyes to form an eye smile while saying why he is happy. When is he mad , he also tells me. He doesn’t talk a lot first. We do our thing. Then he feels bad. He reassures me that its not my fault. That he needs time , that he is sorry. I just listen . What I can do ? I cannot help him. I’m just here . When he needs me I’m here. That’s all. When I told him that I wanted to stop it, he was mad.
He thought that I hhad ssomeone else. Why so ? Because I was busy so i could not reply to him how I used to. My work was taking a big place in my life. When I was with my coworkers he would not like it. He would be mad at that time. I don’t know what to do. Everyone thinks I’m a hoe. Is it a crime to love someone ? I did not decide it. I wish I could stop my feelings. But every time he texts me, I Feel alive. I feel like someone is caring about me. His smile. His laugh . His gestures. I feel lm the only one. So why can’t I be the only one ? 《 Minho-ya, Why, when I talk about it,you change the subject ? I’m tired . I’m tired of liking you. I give too much. I should ignore what you do to that other girl ? Okay. She is your girlfriend. She has rights. But I’m still mad. I can’t control it. I’m mad she has you. And I should pretend I’m okay. I’m not. This thing is eating me alive. It’s not fair. You got to be with your girlfriend,and I’m alone .all day my thoughts are about you. Its not fair ! I can’t stop it though. I’m trapped. I’m scared to loose you. Do you even care at this point ? Lee Minho. I’m tired of loving you . I need time to myself . Why. Why. Wouldn’t it be more simple to be with me ? I can provide you anything and you know it. We laugh together too . We cry together too. We scream together too. But ..Lee know-ya , I’m still not enough ? I’m writing all this stuff today. Today I’m not the same as yesterday Lee know ya . Let’s stop. I’m exhausted. Today is the day of myself living for myself .
I love you.
Goodbye.》
Ploc ploc ,ploc. My tears falling and erasing some words. I can’t even send him this letter. I’m..sorry.
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