Five Hundred Miles

1.8: Her lips.

Chapter 1.8: Her lips. [UNEDITED]

["A moment later the boy whispered, "I don't think you're ugly."
"Shhhh!" the girl hissed. But hidden by the deep shadows of the cupboard, she smiled."
― Leigh Bardugo,Shadow and Bone]

(Gideon's P.O.V )

Derek likes the woman, obviously. I see the way he looks at her, and I can tell that he'll fall hard. Natalie is one cheerful and intelligent girl, because if it weren't her and her genius idea, we'll all be fried. Cara can be one fucking bitch who doesn't understand denial.

Faith is smiling and giggling at something Natalie is saying to her, and it makes my heart convulse. I love the way she laughs, and hate it that I can't make her. I've tried ways to attract her, did things I've never done before. I could never restrain myself from women, especially women in my bed.

But with her it's different. It's always different with her. I resist from slamming her onto the bed and kissing her, but can barely. Something in me knows that I will have to try very hard to earn that from her.

I get off the couch and to the kitchen in search of a beer. My stomach is churning as I haven't had my breakfast after working out. This morning I barely even did anything, because Faith needs company.

Usually I won't wake up at five for a woman even if she wants to pleasure me. Sleep is pretty important.

But the sound of her strangled cries just aches. Those sounds weren't really hers, she has the voice of an angel. But she had a nightmare, and they were real. I want to know what made her cry, badly, but again I have no rights to if she doesn't want to tell me.

My fingers work on opening the canned drink, and I gurgle the beer down in a gulp, letting it's cool and smoothness calm me down.

That's what friends are for.

Her voice rings at the back of my head, and I scowl. That feels like a slap on my face, and yet she doesn't know that her words wound me.

I don't want to be her friend. I want to be...more than a friend. I know that she's a virgin, judging by the way she acts when she talks about sex. I want to pin her up against the wall and have my way with her, I want to kiss her so hard that all she can register is my name, I want to be her first and last, I want to be buried so deep inside her that she can't move when she shatters in pleasure. I want her everything.

I slam the beer on the island, catching everyone's attention. I look at her and her concerned, worried eyes as she rises slowly, her delicate small hands hanging midair. My breath catches and my heart does something very weird. God, I can get a stir by just looking at her.

I turn away so that she-no one sees the lust in my eyes. "I'm just heading back to my room. I need to forward some emails."

"Hey, are you okay?" Derek asks.

I nod briefly at him,and the ladies. "Fine."

Without further elaboration, I walk upstairs. My heart is pounding so very fast for no reasons. I almost dash to my room, turning the doorknob and slamming the door behind me. I place my hand on my heated forehead as I try to be as cool as possible.

My eyes drift to the pictures on my shelf, and then remember when Faith intruded my room moments before. I curse myself for leaving the door open, I was just in pain for a hot shower. I stayed in the bathroom for half an hour, closing my eyes and enjoying the heat until I heard silent footsteps outside. I knew that it's Faith, but still I pretended to not know.