Sugar High

All Of My Internal Organs Are Freaking Out Right Now

Sitting at his kitchen island, Shawn heard his front door open and then close and rested his head against his hands as he steeled himself for the hell that he was about to unleash

What he was about to try to do had been tried before, it was never pretty and never successful but this time he needed to succeed where he had only ever failed before.

"Hi boo" said Carmen as she slipped off her coat and began undoing the buttons of her see through white shirt that she wore sans bra

"Stop!" Shawn's hand shot up, palm facing the girl preparing to get naked in front of him "That's not what this is about. Fasten your shirt and sit down" He didn't mean to sound as harsh as he did but his nerves were shot. This was only going to end one way, messy or very messy

"What's up baby?" she asked dropping a kiss in to his hair and he physically had to stop himself from swatting her face away with his hands

"Sit" she sat on the black bar stool and crossed her legs, purposefully giving him an eye full of the red panties that lay beneath the short, mustard coloured skirt she wore.

"So you called me here for something other than sex, should I get excited?" her blue eyes shone bright as the corner of her lips Egan to curl upwards

"No"

"Well then should I be worried?"

"It's over between us Carmen" he blurted it out, not waiting to find an appropriate moment or a softer way of approaching it. Once it was out there he could start dealing with the consequences

"No its not"

"Carmen, it has been over for pretty much the entire 2 years we have spent together" he admitted, knowing how awful it sounded and knowing how it made him seem but he needed her to get it this time, he needed her to understand and then to leave and never look back. He wasn't good for her, in truth he wasn't good for anyone but he was especially bad for her, because she let him be, she let him do whatever he wanted to her whenever he wanted and without any consequences, other than a rampage to clear up every now and then

"Tell me why"

"Because I don't love you, God, I barely like you most of the time. I'm 27 years old I want to be able to go out and see other girls without feeling this iron ball of guilt rolling around in my guts all the time"

"Shawn, you have been 'seeing' other girls for pretty much our entire relationship, it's worked up until now, why change it?"

"Because I haven't been 'seeing' other girls Carmen, I have been 'fucking' other girls and there's a big difference"

"You've met someone..." her eyes narrowed into slits as she looked at him accusingly

"... No" he knew fine well he didn't sound sincere but this wasn't about Camila, this was about him freeing himself and freeing Carmen too. "I have spoken to your parents..."

"You what?!" Carmen flew out of her chair to his side and grabbed his shoulder "What did you do that for?!"

"I..." he attempted to wriggle himself free of her grip but she grabbed the other shoulder as her nails dug through his this t-shirt and into his skin

"Do. Not. Do. This"

"Carmen..."

"Please Shawn, don't do this to me, whatever I have done wrong I can change, I can be whoever you want me to be. The girl you've met, tell me about her, I will be her, tell me what she does that I don't and I will do it for you, anything you want, anything at all"

"I don't want you to be anyone for me" using more force than he wanted to he finally pried her off of him and he stood up, his height difference giving him the upper hand
"I don't want you Carmen, I shouldn't have used you the way I have"

"Baby please..." as her hand reached for his groin he pushed it away and took a sharp step back "Shawn!"

"Your parents are on their way to collect you to make sure you don't do anything silly"

"Shawn no!"

"This is it Carmen, this is the end" as those words left his tongue she flung herself at him, kicking and hitting, grabbing his hair and pulling until she had a handful of the dark locks. Shawn wrestled with her, trying in vain to remove her from him. He didn't want to hurt her, he knew he had done that enough but as her nails clawed down his face and her teeth sank into his shoulder he did the only thing he could, grabbed her roughly, threw her over his shoulder and carried her out of the front door, spotting hers parents red BMW he carried her to it, her father jumping out and helping Shawn to wrestle her into the vehicle, whilst Carmen screamed and cried and cursed the entire time.

*********

"Hello?"

"Screw the double date, call him and tell him you aren't going bevause you're coming out with me instead"

Please don't argue Camila, I'm not in the fucking mood for it

"Is that your way of saying dump your date and come have sex with me?"

God this girl knows me too well already

"No, it's my way of saying don't go to dinner with some loser when you can come to dinner with a handsome, rich, hot winner in life like me" I hear her breath catch and the lack of a witty retort means she's catching my drift, message being received loud and clear.

"A date?" the surprise in her voice is comical and it lifts my mood which has been flat ever since my altercation with Carmen

"Fuck Camila, don't call it that otherwise I'm gonna have to change my mind"

"So what should I call it then?" her voice is light and seductive and its quickly becoming my favourite sound

"Just call it dinner and a fuck and leave it at that" I cringe at the crassness of my own words but she said 'date' and I had no choice but to rebel

"Okay to dinner, maybe to the fuck and you have yourself a date" I hear her smiling at her own joke and I'm ready to cancel the whole thing but I just dumped my girlfriend, I haven't had sex with anyone other than Camila since my disasterous attempt with Frankie, I guess I can let her call it a date and not freak out, even though all of my internal organs are indeed freaking out right now

*please comment and vote so I know what parts of the story you like and hate

*Also, writing the chapter titles is the part I love most about this story