I've got a lot of friends while working as a moderator...I've got a lot of guys...a lot of guys who are trying to manipulate me with thier fake feelings..some are sending me an inappropriate photos and vedios everytime i ignored them..
Being a moderator is not really a great idea..I lost my silence and private life because of it..everyday I always recieved an annoying call everytime I open my account...but I can't deny it though...the annoying calls from the guys helps me also to forget my future ex..
Today is a lazy day for me..I'm just laying in my bed while holding my phone...I don't know what to do...silence sucks my mood today..silence sucks every bit of energy in my body..i just want to lay down 'till I dont feel anything..I feel empty...I feel empty coz everytime I roam my eyes inside my room...I always remember him..remembering him makes me sick...
But I promised myself already not to message him again..I'm done with him..i don't love him no more..and while reminiscing the past..my phone vibrates in my palm..and I felt like i am revives from drowning of thoughts...a thoughts of pain and being broken...
I slowly bring my phone in front of my face to see who's calling me..and my heart beats slowly.....leads to draw a smile in my lips..I smile at my phone while reading the name of the caller..I never thought a kid will call me despites of all the crazy words I said to him last morning..
I hesitantly press the answer button and bring the phone near to my ear..I am a little bit excited to hear what he's going to tell me..
"Hello sweetheart...why are you calling me?"I asked him slowly to let him know that I am not really feeling well today..
"Yeah..hello..how are you?are you alright?"he asked me back..I can feel how concern he is to me..but I just ignored my feelings...i don't like to expect to much from a kid like him..i don't like to use him as my stress reliever..its so unfair to him...i need to face and solve my own problems..
"Yeah..of course I am.."I lied...I know I'm getting worst day by day in lying to him..coz I know he is not stupid to feel what i am feeling right now.. besides he knows some of my lovelife stories...but I keep on pretending...coz I don't like him to worry...
"Why are you calling me?is there anything you need?"I asked him again for a second time..I just need to finish the conversation instantly to avoid him from being concern on me..
"Nothing..I just missed you..I didn't see you posting in the group?" after hearing his words..I just want to burst into tears...I don't really expect it from him..how can a kid missed someone like me...someone like me who always gave him a pain in his as*
I giggle a little to hide my cranky voice.."you're funny...how can you missed me?I rejected you many times.."I told him while holding myself from sobbing...I don't know why I felt so emotional everytime I heard his concern voice..
