(play video when asked for "better" experience, play now)
He walked out and put on a big smile, like nothing happened. He looked at Bang Chan to show him that he should act like nothing happened too.
But it was a lot harder for the older to accomplish.
"Hey, Chan, are you okay? You look a little sad" Minho asked softly.
Jisung sat down and looked up at Chan again, shaking his head a small bit as if to say 'don't tell them'.
As much as the leader understood he couldn't wipe the downcast look off his tired face.
They voice had quietened down a bit since his little facade started, hopefully it stayed that way.
"Chan?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm good, I'm good"
"Are you sure..? You should have a little nap" Minho suggested "we don't have practice quite yet, you can fit a nap between that time"
Chan nodded and headed off back to bed. Giving Jisung one last sympathetic look before disappearing into his room
You don't want their sympathy. Keep it hidden, even if it means lying to Chan
So much for quieter. Jisung let out a small sigh.
Minho then turned his attention to Jisung "how are you feeling today Ji?" He asked softly.
" 'm okay" Jisung nodded
See? That easy, just keep lying, they'll never know
"You sure?" Changbin asked, scanning the younger's face with his eyes.
Jisung just nodded again, hoping for everyone to stop asking, he didn't need this attention and worry wasted on someone like him. He tired to look as optimistic as possible while answering each of the members questions filled with concern.
They soon left him be and filtered off into separate conversations.
Jisung was tired
Shut up Jisung, you have no right to feel tired after you woke up Chan like that
'you're right' Jisung thought, shaking his head at himself, he was being selfish... Again
When am I not?
"....."
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Soon enough, after Jisung's endless argument with the voice in his head, it was time for practice, Bang Chan had woken up again and had gotten ready, they were now all ready, Jisung still putting on that oh-so-fake-smile that fools oh so many people.
No-one suspected a thing.
Practice went on like normal for everyone. The voice still ushering Jisung on and discipling him on mistakes. He got urged to stay back by it. He informed Chan with a soft smile on his face.
Chan nodded "fine, but don't overwork yourself, remember, you're meant to be taking a break."
He doesn't care, he's only saying that so he isn't held responsible
Once bang Chan had left Jisung spoke "you're wrong, he hugged me and comforted me when you told me to cut"
So? What does that mean? Just because he comforted you, it could be fake just like that smile you wouldn't stop pulling.
"Just shut up" Jisung growled starting the music
Hah, you're really going crazy, aren't you? Stop talking to me you weirdo, everyone will judge you!
"I said shut-" he paused midway through, breathing out with a tensed jaw. What that voice said was the truth, he would get judged, he really was going crazy.
He got on to practicing, he was hungry, but, no, practice came before eating, or so the voice said. And in attempt to stop the voice ringing and yelling at him for his mistakes for just a bit, he didn't eat, even after Bang Chan asked him to. He said he ate before all of the chaos this Morning, which wasn't elaborated, and that he ate a lot.
Thankfully, Chan bought it and Jisung continued to practice until told otherwise.
The person to tell him otherwise was Jeongin.
"Jisung, you've been practicing for way too long, you should come home" Jeongin said, repeating the request the leader had asked him to say to the tired boy standing in front of him at this moment.
Tired was an understatement, Jisung was exhausted, but the voice told him off for his selfishness. He just nodded and drank his water. "Okay Innie, I'll be there in a minute" he said, packing everything up, to which Jeongin nodded and left, waiting for him outside
He left the room to where Jeongin was stood. The younger boy smiled as Jisung walked with him
"Hyung, are you okay? You look really really tired"
"Innie, I'm absolutely fine, completely, really, honestly, seriously fine"
Yes, keep lying, lie lie lie
Shut up
Just shut up
Stop talking
Everyone
Shut up.
Jisung didn't realise he said that out loud. he noticed Jeongin's unreadable expression, staring at him.
Jisung blinked and quizically looked at the younger boy.
"What? Is there something on my face?" He asked softly, but after seeing the younger's face morph into a sadder look, he got more worried "Did I do anything?" He asked again.
Yeah, you existed
"....."
Jeongin raised an eyebrow inquisitively "you weren't talking to me were you?" He asked,
"Pardon? Of course I was, no-one is behind you for me to ask you such questions right?" Jisung was confused
But so was Jeongin "oh, nevermind" he just shrugged it off and continued waking with the older rapper, who humming their newest tune to himself. Jeongin was upset, but he didn't know which but they were elaborating, whether it was the 'shut up bit' or the 'is there something on my face?'
He thought it was the shut up bit, it made him sad that his Hyung was rude to him, but it's probably a one off and Jisung is probably having a hard time.
But he didn't understand it all, how come Jisung was suddenly being so odd, it was the second time he had told any of his bandmates to shut up in such an annoyed voice.
What had they done?
Why did it annoy him so much?
"Hey, Hyung?" Jeongin asks after an uncomfortable few minutes of silence.
"Hm?"
"Have we done anything wrong to you?"
"No, why would you have? I mean, you haven't... Have you?"
"Not that I know of, it's just you're acting all odd and I'm wondering if it's any of our faults. You know?"
"No, it's none of your faults, I'm absolutely fine, sorry I've been acting odd, just tired"
Just smile through it, he'll think you are okay
Jeongin nodded unsurely.
"But-" there was a pause "do you know why Chan-Hyung was upset earlier?"
.
.
.
"He's okay, right?"