Cheshire Chatroom Continuation

24

[Louis' POV]

It had been three days since I'd argued with Perrie. To say I was sad would have been an understatement. She had been there for me, had helped. During lunch, however, she had taken to avoiding my gaze, and was just talking to Zayn or staying with her friend Jade, at her table.

Harry was also continuing to avoid me. He hadn't been in chat since we ... broke up. He always seemed to find some excuse for not being able to come, and Mr. Cowell let him. If I had been doing something like this he would probably have rolled his eyes, forcing me to introduce myself. But Harry was a responsible person, so everyone trusted him. I didn't even miss it. And in any case he had always been too kind and nice. I didn't miss having him there to cuddle me or who knows what. I didn't miss kissing him or hugging him. No. I had Eleanor and we'd gotten closer lately, and I was fine. We had had sex several times lately, and I had also enjoyed it. More or less. But it was still better than dealing with Harry and his silly, adorable, childish dimples.

***

"Hi Lou-Lou!" Fizzy yelled, walking into my room.

I snorted, jokingly serious, "Didn't I tell you to repeat?" She laughed, rolling her eyes, "Maybe ..." I sighed and turned to the computer shaking the mouse to resume playing Sims. I frowned slightly: it was the family that Harry and I had created. The one with the nerdy kid that Harry had forced me to dress in a loser sweater. I remembered the discussion we had had, not too long ago.

"Is there something wrong? My mom started saying "You're sad... you actually seem so worried these past few days," Fizzy said softly, approaching me. I rolled my eyes, "I'm fine! Why is everyone asking me that! It's annoying and useless." She backed away at my tone before glaring at me, "Sorry I tried to be nice! You weren't always so rude, you know. You seemed kinder to me lately, but now you're back to being the rude one again! "

When the door slammed, I groaned. Was I kinder when I was with Harry? I suppose it was true, I was happier with my family, and my grades had improved slightly as well. I had hardly smoked since I started spending free time with him instead of with Niall. My sisters and I seldom got along before Harry became my boyfriend. I guess it was due to the fact that before I was always grumpy and exuberant, while with Harry I had become sweet and caring.

Sighing, I glanced at the Sims on the screen, noticing one with curly hair, Harry. I smiled slightly, remembering how much he complained about dimples not being allowed on the game. He said it made the game unrealistic, as many people had dimples. I just laughed, stroking (in the game) his cheeks, making him giggle. After a while, bored, I decided to quit the game and grabbed my phone. I couldn't start thinking about him, because I didn't need him. After several rings I heard Eleanor's voice say, "Hey beautiful."
"Hey, are your parents home?"

***

The next day, walking through the corridors, I noticed a familiar blonde boy and another with raven hair. The first turned, seeing me, and pointed to a point in the corridor, so I followed the direction of his arm with my eyes. "Well, do you know the frocetto?" Niall asked. I tensed slightly, but nodded nonetheless. Zayn laughed, telling me in a soft whisper, "It looks like the fag has a companion."

"W-What?" I stammered in confusion, feeling a painful, strange tangle in my chest. "Yep, he has a boyfriend," Niall told me with a grin. I frowned, "Who?"

"I don't know, but it's true," Zayn replied, puzzled by my expression,

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Oh, um nothing. Hey, let's go to science before we go into detention, "I concluded, trying to mask my emotions. They both nodded and closed their lockers before following me. Was Harry dating anyone? But we just broke up ... I mean, yeah, I was somehow dating Eleanor too, but it just didn't feel right that he was engaged. It seemed selfish as a reasoning, but I didn't care. I shook my head, and with her those thoughts as I entered the classroom. They were probably just rumors. There was no chance Harry could have found anyone else that quickly, he sure was lovely ... and sweet ... and understanding and funny ... ugh no. Nobody could go out with him, because he was mine. Only mine. Even if he didn't want to be.

***

When I left the classroom, I spotted Perrie in the hall. She must have noticed, because she looked at me for a moment, only to then avoid my eyes by moving to the end of the corridor. I sighed, because I had pushed away the only person who was actually my friend?

On my way to my next class, I recognized a familiar curly head. My heart practically burst upon seeing him, but then faltered when I realized he wasn't alone. But that wasn't the only reason: he was with Liam and they were holding hands. I felt my teeth clench as Liam wrapped his arm around Harry, who seemed to accept that contact willingly. Liam caught my eye as Harry had his back to me. He grinned in my direction before whispering something into his ear, making him blush. My grip on the books intensified so much that my knuckles turned white. Only I could make Harry blush.

Suddenly Liam leaned over, catching Harry's lips in a kiss, and the worst part was that Harry was smiling. Then everything became clear: Liam was dating Harry. I felt my world collapse around me as I watched them kiss. Liam pulled away from the kiss and winked in my direction, at the same instant as Harry tilted his head and rested it on his chest with his eyes closed, sighing contentedly. My breathing became heavy and before I knew it I was angry, running out the doors to go home

***

When I entered the apartment, I slammed the door and hurried up the stairs to my room. "Louis?" my mother asked from the kitchen. I ignored her and threw my bag on the ground. I paced back and forth, panting heavily, and feeling the blood flow steadily through my veins.

How could Harry date him? Did we just break up and did he automatically go to the next customer? Why did I care? I didn't even like it anymore, it was just a phase. But so why was I so mad seeing him kissing Liam? He should have been single, feeling bad about breaking up with me! The sad thing was that Liam was so much better than me for Harry, he would have treated him better and I hated him.

I gritted my teeth feeling the adrenaline invade my veins. My hands, clenched into fists, melted and before I knew it I started throwing everything on the bedside table, on the desk, crashing all the objects around the room, and then making them fall to the floor . I banged my head against the wall groaning. I took a look at the mess I made and my eyes stopped on the photo of me and Harry.

Harry.

It was him. He had done all that to me. He made me gay, it was all his fault! He was the one who made me feel those emotions. It had ruined my life and at that moment I felt like I couldn't get it back. I picked up the photo by throwing it against the wall and thus breaking the glass of the frame before it fell to the ground. "Louis ?! Louis! Open the door!" my mother yelled, forcing the doorknob. I don't know what happened, but suddenly I curled up on the floor, bursting with tears. I felt arms wrap around me and my mother began to rock me to calm me down, "Oh Lou, what happened?" I didn't answer. I just sobbed on his chest. Confused, jealous and heartbroken. Hoping that everything would pass.

***

I woke up seeing the darkness outside the window. I realized that my mother had probably put me to bed and I sighed, realizing the time. Ten in the evening. I was not tired. Considering that I had slept for hours, I also understood why. I got up and stretched. Everything I had experienced before returned to make its way into my thoughts.

Why couldn't I just be happy? Why was I so worried about what people might think of me? If I had simply come out to Harry at that time we would have been happy and I would not have been standing there in my room crying silently while my family slept soundly. The image of Liam and Harry kissing kept swirling in my mind. Along with that smug look that Liam had given me immediately after moving away from Harry's lips, as if to say 'I won'. As if it were some kind of game. But wasn't that what Harry wanted to tell me? What feeling he had, thinking that I was playing with him, thinking that I was treating our relationship like it was a game? So it was all my fault. I was the only one to really blame. And at that moment I just wanted to forget everything. And there was only one way to do it.

***

"Hey boy, do you have an identity card?" the man asked. I took it out and showed it to him, showing him that I was eighteen and that I was in order. He nodded and offered me a drink, which I swallowed quickly. But that was just the beginning. It was going to be a long night.
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a/n: im reading the story while translating and skxbsja im in love w this story so much omll :p