Band Member Oneshots

Shattered Carcass

A polyramous relationship, just like any other standard romantic partnership, comes with difficulties and fortunately solutions. However, when you find yourself in a complex predicament of the latter, confessing is mind-bending, impossible even.

The idea of a polyramous relationship was not one you highly fostered.

Having your life shaken up by an astronomic tribulation was also a twist you didn't particularly anticipate.

Yet, fate, as undesirable as it may be, managed to include both of these affairs into your lifestyle.

Which is how you found yourself staring at the small screen of a white rectangular assemblage of plastic and metal which displayed a positive result.

Now left with absolutely no time to reminiscence on the past events leading up to this shocking outcome, your body automatically switched unto auto-pilot mode and performed a series of swift as a result: picking up the positive pregnancy test from the tour bus bathroom sink, then shifting from a sitting position to a standing one, followed by buttoning your pants, continued by accidentally slamming the toilet seat with a hard thud and finishing by opening the thin wooden separator distancing you from your boyfriends.

You found them both sitting on the same side of the kitchen table, Josh on the far right, Tyler on the left, with their backs turned to you, each very occupied with a hefty bowl of Waffle Crisps. Although you couldn't see Tyler's facial expression, you assumed that, just like whenever he chewed cereal, he was deeply concentrated in something unknown. Unlike the deeply invested brunet, Josh had pivoted his body and head in your direction, facial expression and body posture permanently frozen in concern, interrupting his cereal eating. No doubt a result of the toilet bowl slamming.

With an expression like the one Josh was sporting, one of genuine concern that is, you should have felt comforted by the fact that he was so anxious about your whereabouts and your nerves should also have somewhat settled. Yet, Josh's gaze ignited the complete opposite. Although very brief in nature, the visual contact you upheld with his mocha orbs sent a wave of fear and shame coursing through your veins as you realized that he'd inquire about the predicament's history. Something you hadn't quite completely thought of during flight mode.

As a result of this newly developed sheer guilt and distress, you avoided sharing any more visual contact with the two males by dropping your gaze to the floor and structunizing the invisible carpet pattern. In reality, this was a quick way of protracting the impending life-changing confrontation that no one in your unique position was willing to face.

"(Y/N)?"

You could recognize that hearty sweetness anywhere and anytime, yet this was not one of those times that your brown-haired boyfriend's comforting voice drew you in. Just like Josh's silent worry, Tyler's tone seemed to have the opposite effect of comfort. No matter how calm, collected and concerned his voice was, you felt that you had no right to be treated with such the luxury of affection or diligent concern.

"(Y/N). We can't help you if you don't tell us what's wrong."

As Tyler soothingly pointed out the obvious, you still remained in your current standing. still gazing down at the carpet's pattern that is. Thoughts about future courses of action steadily blossoming in your brain while doing so.

"Dammit (Y/N)! Talk!"

This time, the voice was not Tyler's but rather the older bearded man's. Neither soothing, luring nor gentle, Josh's tone was instead irritated and frustrated by your silent behavior. Although you knew for a fact that he wasn't violent in nature, you did know that if he found a situation severe, like the current one, he wouldn't shy away from infuriation.

And so, in order to avoid matters escalating further than they were, you were left with one sole decision: to tell them the complete truth in the most rapid of ways, even though disbelief and humiliation were going to be unmissable reactions.

Taking an initial deep breath, you forced your brain to firmly shut your eyes as last-minute positive visualization, although not much, came into view. As your eyes remained glued to the carpet once more, you fingered the test hidden in the back pocket of your jeans before cautiously plucking it from its hold with the tip of two fingers. Now hidden behind your lower back, it felt as though the pregnancy test has somehow injected venom into your bloodstream. Currently powerless, you took a final deep breath all while bringing both the test and your gaze to both men's eye level.

In addition to being greeted with an eerie deafening silence from the two men, you were also welcomed with expressions that went well beyond shock and disappointment. One may attempt to describe them as a voiceless, repelled and immobilized but, generally speaking, both men were shooting invisible daggers in your direction

Reduced to staring at the mosh colored carpet once more, the thoughts and emotions that were, moments before steadily blossoming, had now fully transformed into coherent ones.

It all began with a comparison to other unplanned pregnancies. Just like the latter, the sentiment of condemnation, of loss, of extreme confusion and of guilt, as well as a loss of direction were operating at full speed. Then, it continued on with your perception of the boys' reaction. As you saw their discontent facial expressions, your heart, without a doubt, crushed but in all fairness it was to be expected. After all, they had told you to postpone the thought of kids after touring and recording was over. And here you were doing exactly the opposite, despite how simple and clear their instructions had been.

Following this, you felt completely lost when questions regarding the baby's life formed in your brain. Answers to questions such as "Do I keep, abort or put the baby up for adoption?" and "What the hell am I supposed to do now?" remained completely blank and they seemed to have that potential for an unknown period of time.

However, no matter how vital the latter concerns were, one particular dilemma was weighing far more heavily than the rest. The simple reason being that it would not only affect the polyramous dynamic you maintained with Josh and Tyler but your reputation as well.

Judging by the men's authoritive question that startled you, it seemed that during their moment of silence, they, just as you had, also deliberated over crucial matters. Most importantly, though, they were pressed over the most essential one.

"(Y/N). Which one of us is the father?"

There it was. The issue that had you bothered since the test displayed positive. The most earth-shaking concern of all: who was the baby's father. As you realized just how you'd surrender all things you cherish, a wave of warm tears jostled your body and your throat choked up. Not the best conditions for answering their grievous question.

"I-I," you initially stuttered, then tried a second time but traveled on the same wavelength. "I, I." It was only during the third and final explanation that you enunciated the full response. Although it was feeble, it equally shattered both Tyler and Josh's bodies to shattered carcass.

"I don't know"